


Little Red Wagon

by MrsHSolo



Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, IReallyHaveNoIdeaAboutThis, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-09
Updated: 2016-12-12
Packaged: 2018-08-20 10:56:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 38,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8246381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrsHSolo/pseuds/MrsHSolo
Summary: 2 words - Nanny Therese. 'Nuff said.





	1. Puff... Puff...

Therese has been waiting for her friend Dannie at their favorite café sitting on their favorite spot, the smoking lounge, for almost half an hour now. The lounge is located at the back of the café, across an empty alley. The area is small and intimate with only 3 tables that can accommodate the customers. Therese like it there because they can have peace and privacy during a conversation. In addition, it is always so certain that they will be alone at that place, it is very seldom for them to share the place with another customer.

“ _He’s always. ALWAYS. Late”_ she thought.  

Therese, alone at the area, just finished her fifth stick of cigarette and her second cup of coffee while waiting for her dark haired friend. It is a lazy Saturday afternoon, so, she doesn’t have any place to go to right now. She swung by her office earlier that morning.

This 25 year old brunette is working as a photographer and writer for a popular lifestyle blog, she dropped some photos and negatives of food and dogs, her assignment for the previous week, then got her list of assignments for the upcoming week. Seeing the envelope that contains her new assignment with a written note from her boss that says “Goodluck Belivet! I trust you with this one! Xoxo Gen” made her uncomfortable. She knows that something is up. Nervous about the thing that she was about to read, she tear open the envelope and slowly unfold the paper…

_Belivet._

_Assignment: TODDLERS._

_Note: See you in 2 weeks_.

 

Therese rolled her eyes, she thought that it has been a knowledge to her boss that she doesn’t do or capture humans. She is more up for animals, food, peculiar and bizarre events and those artsy stuffs that need some attention in the world of lifestyle blogs. She just can’t understand the reason why Gen, her boss, decided to give this assignment to her instead of giving it to Michael, who usually do this kind of stuffs. Before leaving the office, Therese decided to ring her boss, there must be some kind of mistake, she thought.

“Hi. Gen, it’s me.” Therese said when she heard that the other line picked up the call.

“Hey Belivet, what’s up?”

 _Why is she acting like that she has no clue that there’s something wrong._ Therese thought.

“Ahmm. Yeah. About my assignment..” Therese continued.

“Yep. What about it?” asked Gen.

Therese who is now pressing her cellphone to her shoulder so that she can examine the paper more closely with her two hands.

 _Holding it with two hands will really change a thing. Good job Belivet,_ Therese told to herself.

“Well, Gen, it’s about... It’s about…”

“Toddlers. I know.” Gen cut off Therese before the latter can finish her sentence.

“Exactly Gen! It is about toddlers. You know that I can’t do humans. Can you give this one to Michael? I’ll get his assignment for the week.”

“Belivet!” Therese suddenly stood up straight because Gen just used her professional voice to her.

“That is the one assigned to you.” Gen continued.

“But…”

“Therese, as your boss…” Gen’s voiced softened “and as your friend… I think it is now the time for you to grow up and conquer that fear of yours.”

“But…”

“No buts Belivet! And besides, it  is a two week assignment, so you have the time in the world to do something. It has extra plus on it so… i mean. Extra bucks. I know that you can’t refuse a little bucks in that small world of yours” Gen playfully said

 “Plus… Michael has some ‘human assignment’ too. He is going to tail a big shot in Wallstreet for a week. So, consider yourself lucky that I only gave you the bite size…” Gen chuckled at her own joke.

Therese, even though still numb and don’t know how to process the event that’s happening right now, smiled. She really felt lucky having a boss and a friend like Gen.

“Got it Boss!” she said.

“Good girl. Well, please check in the office on Thursday around 11 in the morning. I just want to check your progress by then. Alright Belivet?”

“Yes…” Therese weakly replied.

“Therese?” Gen said this very softly, almost like a whisper.

“Hmm?”

“I believe in you. You can do this.” Therese can feel the sincerity in the voice on the other line, she was really grateful.

“Thanks Gen. I appreciate it.. really. Bye!”

“Goodbye! See you Thursday.”

With that, the phone call reached its end. Therese, contemplated what do and called her closest friend. Dannie agreed to meet her on their favorite café by 4pm. 30 minutes had passed, her dark haired friend is still nowhere to be seen.

\---

Therese puts another cigarette on her mouth, just thinking about her assigned task for the next two weeks is really making her anxious. Therese retrieves her lighter from her pocket and proceeds to light her cigarette.

_Click.._

_Click…_

_Click.._

_Oh for fuck’s sake_ Therese thought while shaking her lighter up and down. Hoping that this action will help in producing that precious fire that she craves for. Looking at the end of the cigarette at her mouth, Therese once again tried her luck with her lighter.

_Click…_

She heard that someone entered the premise of the smoking lounge. Without looking up from her cigarette Therese sighed, she tried again...

_Click.._

From her peripheral vision, she can see that a blonde woman settled at the table an arms away from her table. Without giving a single care in the world, she continued.

_Click…_

“Goddamnit!” she said a little too loud for a whisper.

_Click…_

_Click…_

 

“Here Darling, let me…”

_Click…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have already uploaded this story several months ago on another site but decided that I'll continue it here. Changed minor details from the original one though e.g. Title and so much more. I still don't know how to do "1/?" thing. Multiple chapters guys! My bad. Haha. Hope you enjoy! :)


	2. Light my fire

_Click…_

 “Please let me…”

 Therese was startled by a voice as deep as an endless well yet it was so gentle, making her heart swell.

  _Click…_

 A woman with her golden flowing curls twirled freely around her alabaster shoulders is leaning close to her offering a lit lighter. Unable to lift her eyes from the stranger’s, Therese leaned over to the fire to light her cigarette. Drowning on the empty void and dark clarity of a boundless field of stars of those piercing dark grey eyes, she gasps for breath. Immediately, cigarette smoke and the stranger’s perfume filled her lungs, intoxicating her. In that moment, it seems like everything around Therese stood still, although in contrary life moves on at a regular pace. But for her, she is slow and losing this race. She smelled how irresistible its effects are and how with lightning speed it spreads, she just became a captive of this godly woman before her.

 “You’re welcome” the stranger whispered into her ear, breathing life into Therese.

She felt a slight nudge on her heart as the stranger withdrew her lighter and placed it back inside her purse. The blonde stood up straight and winked at her, leaving Therese fully flustered. Therese followed the woman with her eyes, the stranger is now sitting on the table just an arm or two away from her. The blonde feeling eyes on her, looked back at Therese, with lips slightly parted, gave a smile that smiles in the infinite moment to the young lady revealing a wrinkle or two on her eyes. Feeling the heat creeping up on her cheeks, Therese quickly averted the gaze by hastily looking up. She noticed that the sun decorates the vast pale blue canvas with clouds blossoming on either side of the view. Breathing deeply, she became lost in the sky.

\---

“Hey! Belivet? What are you staring at?” exclaimed Dannie while taking the seat across Therese.

“Dannie!” Feeling relieved that she now have a company, she punched her friend on the arm.

“Ouch! What the…”

“That’s for being late!”

“Geez. Belivet. I’m sorry, alright? Got held up by Phil..” Dannie explained while rubbing the spot where Therese hit him.

“So? Spill it. Why the sudden meeting? What’s this news of yours that you can’t talk through phone Belivet?” Dannie continued.

Therese is still constructing her story about today’s event when her attention was diverted by a burst of laughter from the other table. She looked at the blonde stranger laughing her heart out with another woman.

Weird, she didn’t notice the other woman arriving, how long was she looking up at the sky?

With the laughter reverberating on her ear, she closed her eyes and savor the sound. It is like an orchestra playing on her ears, the laugh is making her drunk from reality. She suddenly felt jealous for that brunette woman for causing a sound that mere mortals has no right to be on the receiving end.

“Belivet, are you alright?” Dannie interrupted her thought.

“Yeah. I guess so... Have you ordered a drink?” Therese asked.

“Yes. I already ordered. So, what’s up?” he asked.

Therese took a deep breath and proceeds to tell the story of what had transpired in the morning of that day. She was just talking and Dannie is just intently listening to her. After concluding her story, Therese found herself breathless with all the talking and emotions that she had ripped out on Dannie. In that moment, the waiter arrived with Dannie’s order, both he and Therese thanked the waiter before he left.

“So, toddlers huh? What’s your plan Belivet?” Dannie asked before having a sip of his coffee. Before answering, Therese placed another cigarette on her mouth, all that talking made her crave for another, and she suddenly remembered that her lighter is “under the weather” today. She quickly glanced at the table beside them and saw that women are sipping their cups, engrossed with their own conversation.

Dannie, being a gentleman, offered his lighter to Therese. She took it, lit her cigarette, gave Dannie his lighter back and took a long drag before answering her friend.

“I’m going to be a Nanny” she announced to her friend. Feeling proud and relaxed that she have thought of a plan in that instant, she slouched back at her seat and took another drag from her cigarette.

“Did you just say that you’re going to be a NANNY?! How many coffees did you…” Dannie lost his composure and spoke the words a little loud. He looked around and saw that he disturbed the conversation between the women on the other table and they are now looking at him with curiosity in their eyes. He smiled apologetically to the women and sank back to his chair. He looked at Therese directly in her eyes, and saw that she is really serious about her statement.

“You heard it right Dannie… I’m going to be a Nanny” Therese repeated her statement to convince her friend, even herself, that this is a good plan. She took a drag on her cigarette.

“And how will that help you with your assignment?” Dannie asked.

“Well, toddlers. Those little bastards will help me understand and really engage with another human being while I help them keep shits off their pants…”

“But first of all, you need to WATCH your words! You are like a sailor! Geez, Belivet..” Dannie chuckled.

“OH COME ON! Those bambinos can’t understand them!”

“Yeah right… but you still need to watch it”

Therese exaggerated a sigh, rolled her eyes and nodded to her friend making Dannie almost spit his coffee ‘cause of laughter. Once settled down, Therese continued in a slightly serious tone.

“You are the one who keeps on telling me that I should take more pictures of humans Dannie…”

“Yes, I remember that…” he nodded.

“I feel like… I feel like I am invading their privacy by capturing and taking photos of them.. It feels so personal and all. You know that I am not comfortable with that.” She continued.

“I know, I know” said Dannie, who is now softening his voice and his eyes for his friend.

“So, now that I have this assignment on my hand. I just have to let myself invade a privacy of another human being…”

“By changing their nappies?” he chuckled.

“Yes, by changing their dirty nappies. What can be more personal than that?” Therese smiles as her friend bursts out in laughter.

“So what now? Do you have any clients for err… baby sitting?” asked Dannie who is now downing the last drops of his coffee.

“Actually… here’s where you come in. I need contacts… from you.” She said.

“You little awkward creature…” Dannie shook his head and chuckled at his friend.

“I have no friends that has kids… Oh I know, you can ask Mr. and Mrs. Semco if they have a friend who needs a sitter every now and then…” he continued.

Therese sighed loudly before replying

“It’s just that… Arrghh.. I mean… It is awkward. Richard and I just broke up a few months ago. I can’t just pop into their home and ask them if they have a friend who needs a nanny.”

“You have a point there…” he nodded.

For a moment, they sat in silence. Both of them thinking if they have contact or acquaintance who needs a sitter. Every now and then, both of them will throw names at each other, talk about the possibilities then eventually agreeing that the name has no probability of help for the matter at hand.

 ---

“Hi. I’m sorry, we can’t help but overhear…”

Both Dannie and Therese was surprised that the brunette from the adjacent table is standing beside them.

“Oh… by the way, I’m Abby!” said the brunette grinning from ear to ear.

The brunette held out her hand, Dannie abruptly stood up and took her hand to shake…

“Hi. I’m Dannie. This one is Belivet”

Therese hates it when Dannie uses her surname for introductions such as this.

Abby turned to Therese and offered a hand to her. Feeling pressured with this social interactions, Therese forgot that she was holding a lit cigarette by her hand and accidentaly brushed the ember into the brunette’s hand. Abby flinched by the contact.

Therese who happened to evaluate that what she just did was wrong, stood up and made a “Japanese bow” to Abby.

“I’m sorry” said Therese who is still in a Japanese bow in front of the brunette.

Abby who was caught in awe, chuckled and said that it is okay and that both Therese and Dannie should sit down. Once settled, Therese and Dannie watched Abby transfer her chair from her table to theirs. They both heard the blonde stopping Abby but to no avail the blonde just settled for a chuckle and shrugged her shoulders.

“So… after that awkward bow.” Abby is playfully teasing Therese, who is now very red from embarrassment “Let me start again. We, my friend and I, she’s over there...” she pointed to the blonde woman who is just looking at her phone “...overheard your conversation.”

“As what we have gathered, we now know that you are now a part time baby sitter who’s looking for a client? Aint that right Belivet?” asked abby.

“Therese” she corrected Abby in almost a whisper.

“What’s that honey?”

“My name is…” she said still a little softer than usual, she cleared her throat “My name is Therese” she added a weak smile and avoided eye contact by looking at her knees.

“Oh I’m sorry. Okay Therese” answered Abby.

“Yes!” Dannie Interjected “Yes, we are actually looking for potential clients right now.”

“Well… today is your lucky day!” Abby said with a friendly tap on Dannie’s shoulder.

“You see, my friend there, that blonde nitwit, is in dire need of a nanny to take care of her daughter tomorrow evening.” Abby continued.

“So, do you feel like doing it?” the question is now directed towards Therese.

Therese is now overwhelmed with what’s happening right now and most importantly she can see by her peripheral vision that the blonde’s eyes is fixed on her. Realizing that the blonde was eavesdropping to their conversation made her breathless. She looked at Dannie and then Abby, both of whom are eagerly waiting for her answer. She suddenly felt pressure and looked down at the cigarette between her fingers that has only the filter left on it.

 

“Well Belivet? Are you up for this? Remember, this IS your plan.” Dannie said.

A pause.

Therese raised her head and looked directly at the blonde on the other table. Her heart jumped a little when she saw the stranger flashed a smile warmer than the sunshine in a mid-summer day at her.

She smiled back, revealing her deep dimples on her cheeks, and still looking directly at the blonde she said…

“Yes, yes I would”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "A Nanny Therese?!"
> 
> Yes, yes I know. WTF right??


	3. Hello, I <3 U, Won't you tell me your name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

In the horizon ahead, gulls are flying low beneath the layers of white clouds almost touching the blue waters of the ocean. Therese is standing by the shore line, her bare feet is numbed by the contact of waves with sad memories dancing on the golden sand. Shying away from the distance, a child is running towards her screaming and shouting her heart out with glee. She still can’t see the face of the child but somehow, she can feel her heart is full of longing and craving to lift the child into her arms. Suddenly, a loud alarm started to shriek at her ear causing her to panic.

_Something is definitely wrong._

She ran towards the child but she can’t seem to close the distance between them. But nevertheless, although breathless she didn’t stop running until one misstep cause her to tumble down.

Therese jolted awake on her bed, her alarm clock screaming.

She opened her eyes, turned off the alarm and tried to recall what her dream was about.

_Weird, I never had a dream so clear and so real like this before._

She was laying on her back and staring on her ceiling when all the memories from yesterday’s events came back to her. Her assignment, Gen, coffee shop, Dannie, Abby… and the Blonde.

Therese cursed to herself when she remembered that she didn’t get the chance to catch the blonde’s name.

After agreeing that she will baby sit the blonde’s kid, Therese and Abby exchanged contact details. Abby told her that they will certainly reach her in the morning. The woman said her goodbyes telling her blonde companion that they should probably leave or else they are going to be late somewhere. The blonde stood up from her chair, fixed her hair and walked towards the exit of the lounge. Before opening the door, she looked back at Dannie and gave him a smile. She then looked directly to Therese, still smiling, the blonde nod her head, gave a playful wink and then resumed walking towards the door. Leaving Therese breathless.

After the two women left, Therese and Dannie stayed for a little while before calling it a day. Therese promised Dannie that she will ring him right after the call of Abby.

As the morning sun slowly invades and illuminates the space of her one bedroom apartment, her mind is wandering towards the images of the blonde woman. If only she had brought her camera with her that afternoon and took a snap of the woman. She got restless thinking that in a few hours, Therese will once again meet the blonde and finally her child. She smiled at this thought, she imagined and played different possible scenarios in her head that may happen later that day. Without knowing it, Therese fell back to sleep that morning. A few hours later, she was again awakened by a loud sound.

_Damn, I fell asleep. Oh god, what’s that annoying sound?! Make it stop Belivet! OH SHIT! That’s my ringtone!_

With eyes still closed, Therese reached for her phone on the bedside table and answered the call…

“Heeellooooo?” she answered while yawning not giving a care of who it might be.

“Hello?… Teresa Bellivet?”           

Therese froze. She knows that voice. She will always know THAT voice anywhere, anytime and in whatever state of her mind she is in. Time goes on and things will pass but this timeless voice will last.

“Yes? Who is this?” she asked, even though deep down inside she knows too damn well who’s on the other line.

“Hi. We met at the café yesterday… Well technically, you met my friend Abby…”

A pause.

“Ahmm. Hello? Are you still there?”

_She’s waiting for your response! Speak! SPEAK!_

“Yes! Yes, ofcourse. Hi! So, where’s Abby? I was expecting that she will be the one who’s going to get in touch with me” she replied.

“Oh, she is… ahmm… A little occupied this morning.”

A pause.

The blonde was the one who broke the silence…

“So, are you free tonight?”

_What?! Is she asking me for a date?!_

“I mean… About the baby-sitting thing? I could really use a help right now.”

_Get a grip Belivet, it is about the job!_

Therese who’s still dumbfounded by the conversation remained silent on the other line. The blonde thinking that Therese is having a second thought about this arrangement continued to talk.

“Please don’t worry about the rate. I’ll give you what you ask for…”

Therese who sensed that feeling of desperation on the blonde’s voice snapped back to reality.

“Oh no! Don’t worry about it… I mean… I’m not worrying about it at all… Don’t think about the rate, I can do this for free… I mean..”

_Keep your shit together Belivet! Stop blabbering like a buffoon._

“You’re very kind.” She chuckled “But I must insist in paying the rate.”

“Well, of course. Of course… If you insist...”

“So, is that a yes?”

“Yes!”

“Oh how wonderful! Thank you so much for doing this darling…” the stranger exclaimed.

_Darling… Oh god, haalp!_

Therese smiled.

“Pleasured, I am!”

Therese heard a chuckle from the other line, her heart skipped a beat knowing that she made the blonde smile, even though it is because of her mindless stutter and geekiness.

“I mean… It is my pleasure!” she quickly added

_Smooth Belivet. And that is sarcasm in case you didn’t notice. Really, Yoda?!_

The blonde told her that she will just text her the details.

 “Well, that’s that… Good-bye Teresa.”

The blonde cleared her throat

“For your help, much gratitude and respect, I have” the blonde imitated the voice of Yoda making Therese giggle.

“Did I get it right?” the blonde asked her playfully.

“Yes. You’re pretty good, actually.”

“Thanks. My kid is into Starwars, so I’ve been having a lot practice lately.”

Therese smiled.

 “Well, I have to go. See you later!”

 “See you…” Therese whispered. Her cellphone remained pressed on her ear until she heard a tone signifying that the call was ended. Few moments later, her phone beeped, she hurriedly read the new message. It was from the blonde, it is the details of their meeting. They’ll meet by 4 pm in front of the blonde’s apartment in Madison Avenue.

_Swank._

Therese dreamily lay on her bed with hands clenching the cellphone by her chest. She remained like that for god knows how many minutes. She then decided to save the blonde’s number into her contact list, until suddenly it hit her…

_I still don’t know her name._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starwars geek Carol. Amarayt?


	4. Sugar Plum Fairy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tried this style cause this chapter is heavy with conversations, leaving you guys to make your own perceptions of the characters' emotions. I hope it turns out alright. Enjoy!

**INT. BLONDE'S BUILDDING.** **H** **ALLWAY, Sunday 4:06pm**

Therese is standing and anxiously waiting in front of the door of the Blonde’s apartment. She had 2 sticks of cigarettes before coming up the building to calm her nerves, regretting it immediately cause now she reeks of smoke. The door opened, revealing a small child behind it, Rindy, she’s about 5 years old. She is now eyeing Therese.

**RINDY**

Yes?

 

**THERESE**

(nervously smiles)

Hi. I am, well, I am the new nanny.

 

**RINDY**

New nanny?

 

**THERESE**

I think so? Your mother…

 

**RINDY**

What happened to Florence?!

 

**THERESE**

Well… I don’t know who Flo—

 

 

The blonde wearing make up and a white robe suddenly appeared behind the young girl.

 

**BLONDE**

Rindy? Sweet pea? Who are you talking to? ( **to Therese)** Hi Teresa! Please, come in!

 

 

The blonde and the girl made way for Therese. As she cross the threshold Therese removes her coat and swing it by her arms. The blonde closes the door behind them and leads Therese into the living room.

 

 

 **INT.** **Blonde’s Apartment, Living Room, Sunday 4:08pm**

The three characters are now standing in the middle of a vast living room.

 

**BLONDE**

(smiling)

I was afraid that you wouldn’t come. Would you like a drink?

 

**THERESE**

Well—

 

**RINDY**

Mommy, who is she?

 

**BLONDE**

Sweet pea, she’s is Teresa. She’s going to care of you tonight while Mommy is working.

 

**THERESE**

My name is not—

 

**RINDY**

What happened to Florence?

 

**BLONDE**

(sighs deeply. Kneels)

Florence is away right now, honey.

 

**RINDY**

Is she coming back?

 

**BLONDE**

I’m afraid not.

 

**RINDY**

But, I want to play with Florence.

 

**BLONDE**

Teresa can play with you tonight.

 

**RINDY**

But--But, she doesn’t know who Mr. and Mrs. Periwinkle and Sugar Plum Fairy are!

 

Therese is now shifting her weight from foot to foot, hearing a conversation about her as if she is not in the exact same room is making her uneasy. Plus, the repeated mistakes about her name is frustrating her.

 

**BLONDE**

You can introduce them to her tonight, honey.

 

**RINDY**

Do you think they’re going to like Teresa, Mommy?

 

**BLONDE**

Oh, I’m sure they will like her. ( **to THERESE)** Is that right Teresa?

 

**THERESE**

Therese!

 

She said it a little too loud. She finally snapped. The blonde and Rindy was shocked about the outburst of their visitor.

 

**BLONDE**

(stands up)

What’s that dear?

 

**THERESE**

(calms down)

Therese. My name is Therese Belivet.

 

**BLONDE**

Terez? Not Teresa?

**THERESE**

(nods)

 

**BLONDE**

It’s lovely.

 

**THERESE**

And your’s?

 

**BLONDE**

Carol.

 

**THERESE**

Carol.

 

Therese and Carol is now gazing at each other. Rindy is pulling the sleeves of the robe getting the attention of Carol.

**CAROL**

(kneels beside Rindy)

 

**RINDY**

(whispers)

I don’t like her, Mommy.

 

Therese can still very well hear the whisper of Rindy. She is now feeling silly and the redness of her face is now crawling down to her neck and chest. Carol, knowing that Therese heard the statement, smiles apologetically to her. Then, the Carol leaned in to Rindy’s ears, whispering something that Therese can’t hear.

 

**RINDY**

(giggles)

Okay. If you say so, Mommy.

 

**CAROL**

(stands up)

Alright. Well dear, why don’t you introduce Mr. and Mrs. Periwinkle to _Therese?_ I need to get ready. **(to THERESE)** I’m going to leave you two alone. Okay?

 

Two beats.

Therese watches Carol glides effortlessly away from the living room and into one the hallway leading to the bedroom. She then shifted her attention to the little child standing in front of her, still eyeing her. She feels intimidated.

 

**THERESE**

Hi?

 

**RINDY**

Follow me.

 

**INT. APARTMENT. RINDY’S ROOM.**

Rindy enters the room first followed by Therese. A vast of toys and dolls are scattered on the floor. In the corner of the room, there is a train set waiting to be assembled. Rindy sits on the small bed, picking up a fairy doll by her side. Therese stands uneasily by the door.

 

**RINDY**

My name is Rindy, by the way.

 

**THERESE**

Nice to meet you Rindy. I’m Therese.

**RINDY**

(Giggles)

I know that silly.

 

A beat.

Therese shifted her weight to another foot.

**RINDY**

(pointing to Therese’s shoulders)

What’s that?

 

**THERESE**

Oh this? This is my camera.

 

**RINDY**

What do you need the camera for?

**THERESE**

I use it to take pictures.

 

**RINDY**

Why do you take pictures?

 

**THERESE**

I need it for my work

 

**RINDY**

You take pictures while you’re baby-sitting?

 

**THERESE**

Actually, no. I’m a photographer.

 

**RINDY**

Phogoprater? What?

 

**THERESE**

(smiling)

Photographer.

 

**RINDY**

What’s that?

 

**THERESE**

I take pictures and publish it on the internet.

 

Two beats.

Therese made her way towards the end of the bed and sits beside Rindy.

**RINDY**

I thought you are my new nanny?

 

**THERESE**

I am.

 

**RINDY**

But you still take pictures?

 

**THERESE**

I do.

**RINDY**

(showing Therese a doll)

This is Sugar Plum Fairy by the way

**THERESE**

Hi. Sugar Plum Fairy.

**RINDY**

Does your camera have a name?

 

**THERESE**

I’m afraid it doesn’t have a name yet.

 

**RINDY**

That’s too bad. Mommy says that if you love something, you should call it a name.

 

**THERESE**

Oh.

 

**RINDY**

That’s why she keeps on calling me, sweet pea or honey. And sometimes Aunt Abby is Darling, Aunt Jeanette is Sweetheart, Aunt Sarah, well, Aunt Sarah is Darling, or Sweetheart or Honey or Darling or --- Pretty much anything.

 

**THERESE**

Aunt Sarah must be really  close to your Mom.

 

**RINDY**

I think so. She’s always here. That’s why I can hear Mommy call her lots of name.

 

**THERESE**

(smiles)

Lucky Aunt Sarah.

 

**RINDY**

I don’t like her.

 

A beat.

 

**THERESE**

(clearing her throat)

Well, you can name my camera for me.

 

**RINDY**

Really?

 

**THERESE**

Sure! Do you have something in mind?

A beat.

  **RINDY**

We should call her Poppy!

 

**THERESE**

Poppy-- I like it!

 

**RINDY**

Can you use Poppy to take a picture of Sugar Plum Fairy?

 

**THERESE**

Sure. Here,( **fixing the doll on Rindy’s hand)** hold her like this.

 

**RINDY**

(smilling)

Like this?

 

**Therese**

(pointing the camera on Rindy)

Yes, stay like that.

 

After Therese took several photos of Rindy with her doll, she let Rindy hold the camera to look at the pictures. Carol comes, wearing black sleek dress, holding a pair of stilettos.

 

 

**CAROL**

Hey sweet pea! (to Therese) I see that you've met Sugar Plum Fairy.

 

**THERESE**

I did!

 

**RINDY**

(holding out the Camera)

Look Mommy! She took pictures of us!

**CAROL**

Did she? How wonderful. Sweetheart, please be careful with Therese's camera.

 

**RINDY**

I will! And her name is Poppy.

 

**CAROL**

I see. Rindy, can I talk to Therese for a little while?

 

The blonde gave a playful wink at Therese.

  

**RINDY**

Sure.

 

Therese and the Blonde is about to make their way towards the door.

  

**RINDY**

Mommy!

 

  **CAROL**

Yes?

 

  **RINDY**

(pointing at Therese)

She’s weird--

 

**CAROL**

Nerinda!

 

**RINDY**

(smilling)

\--I like her too already!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope Rindy's sassiness ain't to much.


	5. Would you like some tea?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Changed the writing style again. This one is a little long. Got carried away, I suppose. Enjoy!

We stepped outside the room into the hallway. I guess she’s now going to give me instructions about Rindy, the do’s and the don’ts, the basic things about baby-sitting, right? I was looking at my fingers playing with the helm of my shirt as I patiently wait for her to speak first. But she is just standing in front of me, gazing at me.  With the limited space that the hallway can offer, we were just an arm away, Carol and I. I decided to lift my eyes up to meet those dark grey ones gazing before me.  The moment that our eyes met, all of the world stood still. Time pauses and nature listens. It is a sweet escape from reality. The dark hallway did nothing but intensify her gaze. I stared within her deep dark eyes, so grey and so deep they seem to go forever. It appeared like she’s lost in her own thoughts that made me wonder, and then suddenly she smiles back from her endeavor. I could tell that my eyes were so transparent, she can see right through me that she’s slowly unravelling my deep darkest secrets just by looking at me. I averted my eyes, unable to hold the intense gaze of the blonde in front of me. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, her perfume immediately starts to sensually dance with my senses. It seeps through my veins and saturates my heart. What kind of spell that this woman got me under?

“Therese, are you okay?” I heard her voice ask me. I opened my eyes and first thing I saw was a face of a goddess full of concern towards a mere mortal – me.

“Are you okay?” she repeated and that’s when I felt it. I can feel the heat of her fingers pressed against my skin.

It is funny how one simple touch of skin, one brush of care, can ignite an infinite invisible firecrackers within me.

“I’m alright” I managed to utter.

“Are you sure?”

I gave her a nod as a reply.

“I am just nervous that’s all” I tried to flash a big smile to reassure her but I know I failed miserably.

“Okay then. How about that drink then? Come” she smiled and slowly withdrew her hand from my arm and proceeded to the living room.

That was the first time that she and I made physical contact. As I follow her to the kitchen -- with my other hand, I caressed the spot on my arm where she held me. Her fevered touch is forever lost but the fiery traces that it left behind is forever seared.

\---

She motioned me to seat on one of the stools by the kitchen counter.

“Do you like a beer? Or perhaps something stronger?”

“Oh no. I'll just have tea if you don't mind. I can't handle my liquor that well.”

My confession just slipped out off my mouth.

“Of course” she said as she turned her back from me and rummaged her cupboard for cups.

“And besides” she added “What kind of a mother am I if I leave my daughter to a tipsy stranger? Right?”

She laughed and once again, her euphoric laugh wrapped my whole humanity into a blissful abyss. Wishing that she'll never stop producing the sound that brings both harmony and disputes over my existence.

I watched her in silence as she fix our drink. I noted that she brings elegance and grace in an ordinary and everyday chore of preparing a tea. I wonder if she also has a wing like little Sugar Plum Fairy for she glides effortlessly in performing the simple task at hand.

As she put the kettle on the stove to boil, she faced me

“So, Therese, Do you always agree to baby sit for a stranger?”

I smiled.

“This is my first time actually”

“I see”

She stared at me like she was waiting for me to continue.

“But I had a lot of practice with kids back in the orphanage—“

“Orphanage? Do you volunteer?”

“No. I was living at an orphanage until, well, until I was in my late teenage years”

Another confession that slipped out off my mouth. Her piercing eyes that were staring has its effects on me that I feel that I am in a trance that I just need to tell her all my secrets. I averted my eyes once again, unable to hold them for long.

“My father died and my mother left me in a home and I never saw her again ever since that day” i continued.

I was actually surprised that I easily told her that story. I have never told it to anyone, not even to Richard.

“I'm sorry to hear that”

I can feel the sincerity of hear voice but I wasn't able to look up to her eyes.

“Don't be. It's was a long time ago and I turned out just fine.”

Finally had the courage to look up and smile at her. To my relief she smiled back.

Thankfully the kettle cries signalling that the water has reached its boiling point. She turned around, grabbed the kettle and placed the cups on the counter. She was pouring the water when I spoke.

“So, where is Rindy's father?”

She stopped on her tracks.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry. You can jus forget about it” I told her, afraid that I just hit a sensitive topic. After all, she is not smitten at me as much as I am to her to open up about the past to a total stranger.

“Nonsense” she smiled and continued to pour water into the cups. When she was done she placed the kettle on the stove then passed me my cup.

“I actually needed a second there to think about the whereabouts of Harge these days”

“Harge is your husband?”

“Ex. Ex husband. We are divorced for about two years now.” She took a sip of her tea and continued “But to answer your question, I think Harge is somewhere in South America for a business trip”

“Must be nice that you guys remained friends”

“Oh no no. I am not going to use those words to describe our situation right now” she chuckled and brushed her hair off her forehead

“We're trying to be civil with each other. For the sake of Rindy”

“Of course”

We took a sip from our cup at the same time. And at the brim of my cup, and for the “millionth” time that afternoon, I again found myself staring at those piercing set of eyes before me.

“So what do you do Therese Belivet?”

“I'm a photographer, actually”

“Really? So, I have an artist within my threshold”

Her eyes are now twinkling with delight I suppose.

“I dont... I don't consider myself as an artist.” I stuttered.

“And why is that?”

“It's just that most of my works that were sold are all for commercial purposes."

"Can I see them?"

"All of my works that I am quite proud of are hidden under my sink in my apartment.”

“Well—“ A beat. “Invite me around” she winked. I can feel all my blood rushing towards my face. I tried to hide it by sipping from my cup but my clumsy self, took a hold of me. I spilled my scorching tea all over my chest and my button up shirt.

“Fuck!” I cried, the heat scorching my skin. I opened the two button of my shirt. I was trying to unstick my soaked shirt from my skin when Carol came running towards me with paper towels in her hands. She immediately dabbed the paper towels all over my chest repeatedly.

“God, I'm so sorry” i told her but I received nothing in reply. She continues to wipe my chest with paper towels. I tried to get the towels from her hands but she just smacked mine.

“Carol, you don't have to. I'm an embarrassing mess”

“Oh shush! That tea was hot as hell”

We remained like that for a few more seconds more, she rummaging and fuzzing over my chest and I, doing nothing but stare at her and repeatedly say that I am sorry. When she ran out of towels, she examined the result.

She made a clicking sound through her tongue

“Oh no. Look how red your chest is. Does it hurt?” she passed a finger over my chest, barely touching my skin.

“It stings”

She then lowered her head close to my chest and proceeded to softly blow over it. I was about to protest but my mouth produced no sounds at all. I closed my eyes and enjoy the soft breeze that was touching my skin. Her lips was extremely close, I know, I felt her lips touched my skin at one point or maybe it was just my imagination. It was very sensual, the way that she's hovering all over my chest, I almost gave out a moan of desperation to want more. I dont know how long she was doing that but we were pulled back to reality when we heard Rindy entered the room.

“Mommy?”

Carol with a straight face, straighten her back, brushed her hair away from her face and looked at Rindy.

“Yes, sweet pea?” she asked

I, on the other hand, can feel that my legs are wiggly. And I am pretty sure that my face is flushed, not because of the tea.

“Ahm. I have something to tell to You and Therese”

Hearing Rindy utter my name made all my senses come back to me.

“Alright sweet pea. But let me first get Therese a new shirt. She spilled her drink.” she said as she playfully caressed her daughter's cheeks. She then disappeared into the hallway.

Coming round my senses, I started to clean up the mess I made by wiping the floor with fresh batch of paper towels.

“Therese...” Rindy said

“Yes Rindy?” I just finished wiping the floor.

“Is this a good time?”

“Sure. But I sure want some fresh new shirt” i said jokingly “But sure, what is it little one?”

This time i was already in front of the sink washing my hands

“It's about Poppy.”

At that moment alone, I knew that she broke Poppy, well my camera. Thankfully, my back was facing Rindy, I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh.

“I didn't mean it. I swear.” Rindy started sobbing.

My eyes are also starting to get misty. That camera was very special to me. The money that I bought it with is the one that Sister Alicia gave to me when I left the home. Ofcourse I have to add a couple of bucks, but still, you guys get it right?

“I was just trying to take a picture of Mr and Mrs Periwinkle when I tripped and... And..” she continues in between sobs.

It maybe a damn old camera but it belonged to me for so long it has become a part of me.

I turned around and looked at Rindy. I saw that my camera is on her hands, its lense broken. I let the tears rolled down my cheeks at that moment. Rindy saw my tears and she repeatedly say that she is sorry. I kneeled in front of her and smiled.

“It's okay Rindy. Don't cry.”

“But Poppy...”

“I'll get Poppy fix. It's alright Rindy.”

I hugged Rindy and rocked her back and forth whispering that it is okay. At this point I was bawling my eyes out too.

This was the state we were at that when Carol reappeared holding a fresh shirt.

“What on earth is ---“

The door bell rings.

I whispered once more to Rindy that is alright and stood up. I saw Carol glancing a puzzled look at me before handling me the shirt.

Door bell rings again.

“Go get changed Therese. I'll be leaving soon” she said.

“I'm coming, I'm coming...” she yelled at the direction of the door.

“Rindy, show Therese where the bathroom is, Sweetpea”

Door bell rings once again.

Carol then proceeds to open the door.

Rindy held my hand and pulled me towards her room. Once inside, she sat by her bed, my camera on her lap.

“Rindy, this is not the bathroom. I need to change my shirt” i told her.

“You can change here”

“Rindy.”

“Please Therese, I dont want to be alone. I'm sad.”

I hesitated for a second.

“Alright. How shall we do this?”

“Just change your clothes silly.”

“But I'm not comfortable that someone's watching me while I change.”

“Okay. I'll go under the covers. Is that good?”

She then starts to put the blanket all over her. I hesitated for a second then proceeded to unbutton my shirt.

“Are you done yet?” she asked

“No.”

“I'm bored. Can you go faster?”

“Well you wouldn't be bored if you just showed me where the bathroom is.”

I heard her giggle.  I looked at the shirt that Carol gave me, it was just a simple printed shirt with the face of Bobba Fett. I smiled.

“Hey Rindy, do you want to watch starwars tonight?” I asked

“Again? No way!”

“What do you mean? I thought that you're into starwars?”

“Therese, I am too young to understand the story. It is too long and has a lot of violence for little girls like me.”

I shrugged, the sassiness of that child is somewhat strong. I wonder who she got it from. I was trying the shirt on when my head got stuck in one of the arm hole.

Yes, a simple task like changing my shirt becomes a complicated objective for me.

“Shit!” i mumbled. Rindy must have heard me said it cause she then removed all the blankets all over her and stood before me.

“You shall not say bad words Therese. You should know better than that.”

“I'm sorry Rindy. I just got stuck. Can you help me?”

“Sure. But wait what is that on your chest?”

“Oh I spilled my hot tea” I said, without actually looking at the thing that she was pointing at.

“Oh. It has a red mark on it”

She immediately started tugging my shirt. We were both struggling with the shirt when the door suddenly opened revealing the blonde.

“Okay. What in the world is going on between the two of you??” Carol exclaimed.

“Mommy! She's stuck!”

“I can see that honey.”

Carol then proceeded to help me with my shirt.

“A moment ago both of you are crying. And then now, you're half naked in front of me and my daughter!”

I was relieved when I heard Rindy giggled, for I can't see the face of Carol to know if she was serious or kidding. It was not long that we managed to put my head on the right whole.

“Well, what a relief. Come sweet pea, say good bye to Aunt Sarah, we are about to leave” Carol said as she was trying to hold the hand of her child. Rindy dodged her mother’s and immediately held my hand.

“Can I just stay here with Therese?” the little blonde said

“Sweet pea, you need to at least say hi to your Aunt Sarah”

“But I don’t like her”

“You’re just going to say ‘Hi’ Rindy.”

“But I don’t want to.”

“Nerinda! You will do as I say this instance!” Rindy stiffened and hid behind me. Her grasp not letting go of my hand.

“I don’t want to! I don’t like her!”

Carol was about to speak again when I interjected

“Rindy, let's go say Hello to your visitor. Alright? Your Mom and I will be there with you” I said softly to the child

“Okay Therese” said Rindy.

I smiled and looked at Carol. With her straight face she looked at me and said

“Sarah is no visitor in this house" cold and stern tone was used to utter the statement.

Carol shifted her attention to Rindy “For godssakes Rindy you know her for almost a year now!”

She then walked out of the room.

“Rindy, you need to say Hi to your Aunt Sarah. Okay?”

She nodded.

Rindy and I, hand in hand, took our time in following Carol into the living room. But we were a little too late cause when we arrived, we heard the door shut close and no one but the two of us was left inside the apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything will make sense by the end. I swear. :)


	6. Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs

For a moment, we stood in the middle of the living room in absolute silence, still hand in hand. But moments later, Rindy squeezed my hand and grinned at me. At that precise moment, we burst out laughing our ass off.

“Rindy, no, we shouldn’t laugh. Your mother is upset” I managed to say in between laughs

“But it’s funny” she replied.

Once we managed to get a hold off ourselves, we went back to her room to introduce me to her toys

“This one here is Mr Periwinkle, Mrs Periwinkle, this is Cinderilli, Ariel, and Princess _Aw-row-ra_ …” she continues while showcasing each of her toys inside her room.

I noticed a train set that has not been assembled yet placed in one corner of the room.

“Rindy, is that a train set over there?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want me to assemble it for you?”

“You can’t. It is missing a piece.”

“Oh” I said, dropping the topic.

When I have met all her toys, we moved to the living room and hosted a tea party with the gang. I was honestly having fun playing with Rindy that once I noticed the clock, it was almost time for dinner.

“Alright little one. Time for dinner.” I said as I stood up from our make shift garden for our tea party made from pillows.

“About time Therese! I’m hungry!”

I went to the kitchen and checked the fridge for food. The fridge was empty except for some beers, cheese, a bunch of apples and some juice box. I rummaged the cupboards and found several boxes of cereals and unopened bottles of wine. Living alone with scarce resources for several years, made me imaginative and resourceful around the kitchen. I had lots of practice whipping up a “gourmet dish” with everyday food supplies. But I think even a five star chef can’t make any decent dish from the available ingredients in front of me.

“Rindy, where do you store your food? I’m pretty sure that normal people like me store them in a fridge.”

I heard her giggle.

“We eat at a diner near here. Sometimes a man delivers our food.”

“What? Does you mom cook?” I exclaimed with disbelief.

“She can’t cook. Sometimes, if Aunt Sarah is with us, we go to boring restaurants.” she said rolling her eyes.

“But my favorite is whenever we’re with Aunt Abby, we always go to a fun place!” she added.

“What do you eat if you’re alone with Florence?”

“A man always delivers it. I like the vegetable rolls but the soup… Yuck! Florence uses sticks to eat them.” She chuckled.

“Mommy usually leave money over there and Florence gives it to the man” she said pointing at the console table by the apartment door.

I approached the table that Rindy was pointing at, and indeed, I found a couple of dollars and attached is a note with different numbers of restaurants that do take outs. At that point, I pity the child, I know how it feels like to grow up not having to eat freshly cooked meals. So I decided to cook dinner. But before that I need to get some groceries. I immediately took my phone out and looked for the nearest grocery around the vicinity, I found one just a couple of minutes away from the building.

“Rindy, do you want to go get groceries with me?” I asked her

“YES! I need to get away from this place, I need some air!” she said to me, exaggerating her arm movements. I can’t help but think that maybe Rindy is an old woman trapped in a toddler’s body.

“How old are you again?” I asked her

“5. But I’m turning 6 in a couple of days… I think.”

“Oh-kay Little Missy. Let’s go get your coat. It’s a little chilly outside. We don’t want you catching a cold.”

On the way to the store, we had a heated debate about the dinner; she wanted Spaghetti and meatballs, and I wanted lasagne. And of course, the toddler won over me. Doing grocery shopping with her was such a breeze, we were in and out of the place in under 20 minutes.

As soon as we arrived back at the apartment, I immediately started cooking our dinner. The little girl insisted in helping so, after I seasoned and spiced up the meat, I let her stand on a chair by the kitchen counter and mold the meat into balls. Then I started to make the sauce and then eventually boil the pasta. The kitchen was in full swing when we heard the front door opened and 2 people came in.

“—that was just unacceptable. Unacceptable!”

“Sssshhh.”

They were still in the hallway by the front door, perhaps taking their coats off, although I still can’t see them, I knew that it was Abby who spoke.

“If you can’t handle her, I will gladly do it for you” Still Abby, trying to minimize the volume of her voice.

“Alright, alright. I’ll talk to her tomorrow” Carol said with equally controlled voice.

“Rindy?” she called her daughter.

“Mommy, I’m cooking, look!” Rindy answered back who is still busy making meatballs. In just a beat Abby immediately showed up in the kitchen but Carol was still nowhere in sight.

“Hey kiddo! Hi Belivet!” Abby said as she messed with Rindy’s hair

“Aunt Abby!” the child exclaimed with ecstasy.

“Hi Abby. Nice to see you again!” I replied.

“Nice to see YOU again!” Abby said she made a Japanese bow in reference to our first meeting. I knew that I blushed as red as a tomato and Rindy gave her a puzzled look.

“Relax! I was just teasing!” she then laughed as hard as she could. There’s something about Abby’s laugh that is so contagious, the next thing I knew the three of us were having a giggle fit in the kitchen. 

“My, oh my, what’s so funny that my girls are having a ruckus over here?” Carol had appeared inside the kitchen with a lit cigarette by her finger, she approached Rindy, leaned by the kitchen counter and tucked the loose hair strands behind the ears of her daughter. Thinking and assuming that Carol just called me one of her girls made me blush much more, so I directed my eyes towards Rindy’s meatballs.

“Therese and I are cooking spaghetti meatballs!” Rindy said, by this time, she was done with all the meatballs.

“I see.” Carol said, and as if by hypnotism, I had enough courage to look at her smiling deep grey eyes. Unable to hold her gaze, I smiled back and turned my back at her to shift my focus on the sauce that I was cooking.

I was stirring the sauce when I feel Carol standing close behind me, looking at the sauce by my shoulders.

“Hmm. That looks delicious” she then placed her hands on my shoulders which made me stop on my tracks.

“Can I have a taste?” she asked me.

“Sure” I answered her without looking back at her.

I handed her the wooden spoon that I was using for stirring. She took it from me, brushing her hand with mine, and dipped it in the pot. Then, she placed it near her red lips and proceeded to slowly blow it. As the spoon touched her lips, I watched her tongue slowly lick off the remnants of the sauce. There was something about her magnetism that must have made her lips like a poison that I crave the every single deadly, lethal and fatal dose.

“Hmm. Yum!” she said “Here, try it!” she quickly added as she slowly bring the spoon by my mouth. I held her hand to take the spoon away from her, but she insisted so I just opened my mouth and let her feed me. I felt so alive, intoxicated and was captivated by her eyes that landed on mine. I felt the electricity flow through my veins then she smiled at me, like a phoenix who just died, I was reborn, I've never felt so alive. I don’t know how long we were gazing at each other, but we were snapped back to reality when Abby suddenly spoke.

“Carol! You didn’t tell me that you just became a _Harge_! How dare you?!” Abby said as she was closing the door of the fridge with a bottle of beer in each hand.

“What are you talking about Abby?” Carol replied back as she was placing the wooden spoon back to the pot.

“Fridge full of beers, and YOU coming home to a ‘Babe’ cooking your dinner! Wow!” again, Abby’s laughter filled the room.

“YOU NITWIT!” surprised by her friend’s remark, Carol slapped Abby on the arm.

“OUCH! This will leave a mark!” The latter tried to retaliate but the blonde was fast enough, dodging the hand of her friend. This goes on for a few moments, Abby tried a few more times to get her revenge, and Carol who was quicker dodged all of them. Rindy joined the riot by going after her mother to revenge her aunt. Soon enough, the three of them are running around the apartment and laughing. I, on the other hand, was trying to focus on the task in hand, trying to be invisible as much as possible. Once their rumpus and adrenaline died down, they all went to lounge in the living room.

After a while, the dinner was served. I told them that I was leaving but the three of them pleaded to join them for dinner, reluctantly, I gave in. Carol was seated at the head of the rectangular dining table, Rindy on her right while Abby is on her left; I was seated beside Abby. Although with just a simple dish, the dinner was festive, Abby and Rindy was taking turns in telling their own stories, the former doing her best to keep it clean for the sake of the latter.  Being side by side with Abby during dinner has its perks; having to experience a front row seat for her stories and not being able to see the bottom of your glass. Whenever she sees my glass half empty, she immediately fill my glass.

“Oh Abby, I’m afraid this is enough for me tonight. Wine makes me naughty--” I told her, when once again she decided to fill my glass with wine by the end of our dinner.

“—But in a good way” I quickly added, blushing. She and Carol laughed at the same time.

Noticing that Rindy can’t keep her eyes open anymore, Carol decided to wash her up and tuck her in. Rindy first said her goodbyes to her Aunt Rindy then she proceeded to hug me.

“Good night Therese. I had fun today.” she told me.

“Me too, Rindy. I really enjoyed today too. Good night Little Missy” I told her while hugging her tighter. We eventually let go of each other. Carol then lifted her up and placed the child by her arms. 

“Will I see you again?” Rindy asked. I looked at the child and then her mother. I don’t know what I shall answer her. Thankfully, Carol interjected.

“You have school tomorrow Sweet Pea. Time for bed.” I smiled at Carol and she beamed the most caring smile that night towards me and mouthed the words “Thank you” towards me. Rindy said her final goodnight to both Abby and I then the two of them then disappeared into the hallway going to Rindy’s room.

Abby and I started to clean up the table and in no time we were done with the dishes, then she gave me an envelope, inside are couple of bills, it is the fee for my nanny duties for the day. I thanked her and she just offered me another glass of wine, and insisted that I should down it in one go, which I did. Carol has not reappeared from Rindy’s room so we decided to move to the living room to smoke. She, once again offered me a drink, this time it is whiskey neat. I accepted it, thinking that it will help me sleep once I got home. As Abby began sharing the explicit versions of her stories, maybe it was because of the alcohol within my system but I found all her jokes and stories fascinating and funny as hell that I was clenching my stomach for laughing so hard. I was in my fourth glass of whiskey while Abby was in her, I think, 9th glass, and both of us were slumped back on the sofa crying our eyes out because of laughter when Carol reappeared from Rindy’s room.

“Therese, it is late. Don’t you have work tomorrow?” Carol said coldly, very opposite from the caring and warm state that she left us with.

“Oh Carol, don’t be a stuuuupe. Beliverrt and I are having sooooo much fun! Right Beliverrt?” Abby said slurring her words in the process.

“TOO muuuch fun, I’m afraid. Carol is right, I shoooold better go, Gerhard.” I was so surprised with my slurred word that I covered my mouth with my hands while giggling. It was not long until Abby joined me and soon we had another giggling fit.

“So you guys are in the last name basis now.” Carol shrugged.

“I should probably go. I’ll just go catch a cab.” I managed to say in between laughs.

“Nonsense Beliveert! I’ll drive youu hoooome! Whuut time is it _Kerol?”_

“It’s almost eleven in the evening” the blonde replied.

“I’ll drive you home Belivert! Carol, lemme borrow your car keys!” Abby tried to stand but failed miserably and was slumped back to the sofa starting another round of laughter from the two of us. Carol was not amused.

“Oh Gerhard, stay here. I’ll just take a cab. You are drunk! You can’t drive!”

“No, no, no! I’m not drunk, YOU are the one who’s drunk!”

“For christsakes, both of you are drunk!” Carol’s remarks stopped us from giggling.

“No we’re not!” Abby quickly said.

“Abby, you can sleep her on my couch. Don’t you dare ruin this couch Abigail! Come Therese, I’ll drive you home. ” The blonde said as she brushed her hair off her face. Both Abby and I stared dumbly at her.

“Well, we don’t have all night…” Carol clapped her head snapping both Abby and I back.

Before saying our goodbye, Abby and I promised to each other that we will grab dinner sometime this week.

I have managed to reach the elevator without needing the help of Carol in walking straight. But once inside the elevator, such small and enclosed place intensified the scent of her perfume. My head began to spin and I began to feel dizzy. By the time we reached the ground floor, I have lost all my ability to walk.

“You should have known better than having Abby as your drinking buddy” carol chuckled as she wrapped her arms around my waist to support me in walking towards the car.

"When I offered you a drink, you told me you don't drink. But when Abby did, you guys suddenly became drinking buddies" she said.

"Abby never let my glass go empty" i giggled.

Then we abruptly stopped. I looked at her and she seemed disturbed.

"You told me you don't drink!" she exclaimed.

Weirded out with her sudden outburst I replied

"I told you that I can't handle my liquor. Which is very obvious by now!"

She was about to say something but instead she closed her mouth and held me by waist tighter than before. When we reached the car, she opened the passenger seat and let me in, then she went around the car and sat on the driver’s seat. I can tell you, I was drunk as a skunk that I can’t even put my seatbelt on properly, Carol noticed this and helped me with it. As she reached over for my seatbelt, her face came very close towards mine.

“You’re beautiful.” the words slipped out of my mouth.

“You’re drunk” she said coldly, But I noticed a little smile on her face as she continued to fuzz about my seatbelt. 

Eventually, we managed to put my seatbelt on. She brushed her hair with her fingers and asked me where I live. I immediately told her the address, the next thing I knew, we were parked outside my building and Carol was waking me up. Her face was once again was very close to mine. I found myself falling within the deep dark eyes before me and once again, her perfume was playing with all my senses.

“Your perfume” I managed to whisper still looking directly at her eyes, afraid that any noise will break this moment.

“What about it?” she also whispered as a reply

“It’s nice”

A beat.

“Thank you. Thank you for today Therese.” She held my hand and squeezed it.

“Sure” I squeezed it back and smiled as warm as I could. We were like that for a few moments, but ultimately I withdrew my hand from her grasp then proceeded to open my door. Before I stepped out of the vehicle, I looked at her once more and said thanks and goodbye. She only nodded and smiled warmly at me. When I managed to arrive in front of my building’s door, I heard her step out of the car. With her long strides, it was not long when I found her standing right in front of me.

“You didn’t answer the question…” she told me. I looked at her puzzled.

“What question?”

“Will I see you again?"

I paused. Unable to formulate an answer in my head.

“Is that Rindy asking or someone else I know?” I eventually replied.

“Well” A beat. “How bout from the both of us? But mostly it's me."  she smiled and I grinned back as a reply. 

“So, will I see you again?” she asked.

I stared at her and for the first time ever, I saw insecurity and perhaps fear on those grey eyes. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before answering.

“Yes.”

She smiled, kissed me on my cheeks and said goodbye. I watched her glide towards the car and looked at the car go until it disappeared into the darkness of the night.

Later that night, when I was about to take a shower, I noticed a red mark on my chest

_Maybe this was the one Rindy was pointing at earlier._

I started to gently smudge it with my bare fingers, I was relieved that it can easily be removed. I was actually scared that it was a burn from the tea I spilled earlier. I examined the mark on my chest…  

_Weird, it looks like a lipstick._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now I want an Abby as my drinking buddy!


	7. Gone girl

As the sun slowly greets the world, our heroine can feel the sunlight delicately kissing her face. Still with her eyes closed, she stirred on her bed trying to dodge the rays of the sun that invades her peaceful slumber. As she managed to change her position, she felt her back and neck constrict with pain.

 _“That’s odd” s_ he thought.

Her bed is not as comfortable as she remembered, she just got this mattress 2 months ago. Taking a mental note that she will have to replace, yet again, her mattress ASAP, she grunted. It was too early for her to get up and Monday is an extension of her weekend, so she decided to sleep in. She again adjusted her position to find a more comfortable one to ease the pain on her back. When she was settled on her new position, she tried to go back to sleep but she have this eerie feeling that someone, or maybe something, was watching her.

She opened one of her eyes and was shocked that a pair of grey eyes was watching her.

“Rindy?” she said, puzzled.

“Good morning!” the girl replied with the widest smile written all over her face.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to subside her irritability that always shows whenever someone wakes her up from her sleep this early. She is not a morning person after all. Though still stunned about why the little girl is in her apartment, with her eyes still closed, our heroine sat right up on her bed… or so she thinks.

“We have breakfast ready. Come Aunt Abby!” Rindy told her pulling her hand.

She opened her eyes and looked around.

“ _Ofcourse, ofcourse_ ” she thought, she managed to get drunk last night, just like every weekend, and her good friend Carol allowed her to crash on the sofa last night. 

Everything is making sense now, the memories from the day before slowly unfolds within her mind; she was in the firm that morning, meeting with the employees, _THAT_ Winston’s house warming party with _Sarah_ and Carol, and dinner with Carol, Rindy and Therese.

“Is she awake now?” she heard the voice of Sarah coming from the kitchen, irritating her more.

“I think so. She’s already sitting up and her eyes are open but she’s just staring.” Rindy replied with a monotone.

She heard Sarah chuckled before speaking “I told you Rindy to let Abby sleep in. I don’t want to hear you complaining about cold breakfast, come eat with me, you mother is still in the shower.”

 Then, Rindy leaned in and whispered to her ears…

“Aunt Abby, wake up! I don’t want to eat breakfast alone with Aunt Sarah. Wake up, please!” although whispering, Abby can sense the desperation in the little girl’s voice.

“Rindy, I told you to come here and eat. Don’t let me tell you twice young lady!” she heard Sarah, annoying our heroine so much, her voice is like the screech that you make whenever you scratch a blackboard with your nail.

“Please Aunt Abby… Wake up…” she heard Rindy whispered once more before leaving her.

Abby stayed seated on the sofa still staring at nowhere, even after Rindy left her. Our heroine would very much like to go back to sleep and let the others go about their morning business, but hearing the desperation on her goddaughter’s voice made her stand up from the couch and follow the little girl to the kitchen.

“Morning…” she lazily announced when she crossed the threshold the kitchen. She found Rindy sitting on her place on the table, while Sarah, wearing a black and white suit with her long blonde hair on a high ponytail and a newspaper spread in front of her face, seating across the table from the child.

“AUNT ABBY, GOOD MORNING!” Rindy merrily greeted her, she then playfully pinched the cheeks of the child as a reply.

“It’s good to see you up this early in the morning Abby” Sarah said monotonously and without lifting her eyes from the newspaper.

“When did you get here?” she asked Sarah.

“Just this morning.”

She grunted back as she took the seat by the head of the table. Noticing that Abby is already seated, Sarah quickly said as she look over the newspaper…

“Oh no Abby, that’s Carol’s seat. Rindy doesn’t want someone else ---“

“That’s okay Aunt Abby can seat there” Rindy interjected.

“—sitting there.”

Shrugging her shoulder, Rindy continued twirling a pasta on her fork while Sarah was staring at the child in front of her with disbelief written all over her face. Abby can feel tension building between the three of them, so she decided to diffuse the situation, it was too early for drama after all.

“So… what are we having for breakfast?” our heroine said, although the answer is in front of her.

“Spaghetti Meatballs!” Rindy answered her.

“Hmmm. Dinner left overs for breakfast! My favorite!” she exclaimed and Rindy giggled.

“Oh by the way Rindy. I’ll be the one who’s going to pick you up from day care today.” Sarah suddenly spoke “It will be fun.” Sarah added with no hint of excitement on her voice.

Rindy only nodded as a reply.

For a moment, the three of them ate breakfast in complete silence except for the sounds of utensils, which our heroine enjoyed very much. Every now and then, she and Rindy will smile at each other as if they’re sharing a secret only the two of them know.

“Abby, about last night at the Winston’s party…” Sarah suddenly broke their silence.

_Oh my god. She’s going to apologize, she was after all a total bitch at that party!_

She looked at Sarah and remained silent, she doesn't want to say anything after all Carol told her that she was going to handle her lover.

 _Lovers... Not for long, I suppose._  

“I know that some statements of mine caused a little, well, uncomfortable moment for all of us.”

Sarah paused a beat to sip on her cup of coffee, shrugging she continued, “I just told Mrs. Winston that the sofa and the carpet doesn’t match the room---“

Our heroine can’t believe it, Sarah was not apologizing to her. She took a deep breath to keep her anger under control, she doesn’t want to burst in front of her goddaughter.

Rindy was busy with her pasta, knowing that it is better not to listen about the adult talk that was happening before her.

“You told Mrs. Winston to have it changed…” she calmly said.

“Yes I did. I advised her to do just that.”

The heroine stared directly at Sarah, Sarah on the other hand, can’t hold the gaze.

“You told her to get a refund…” she continued.  

“Yes, I did.”

“You told her to hire a new interior designer…” she continued “You told her to hire a new I.D. firm. In front. Of. Our. Face.”

“I --- I did.”

Abby abruptly stood up, surprising Rindy and Sarah.

“Well, what the fuck Sarah! You know that our firm is the one who designed the interior of that house! Are you fucking out of your mind??!!” Abby just can’t take it anymore and she just exploded.

Rindy, knowing that she shouldn’t be listening to the argument, decided to retreat back to her room, while shaking her head and whispering “adults” to herself.

“Well, I just felt that it was my responsibility---“ Sarah looked a little flustered and shifted in her seat as she continues “--- to tell Mrs. Winston how I feel about it.”.

“You told her how you feel about it? When did you became an expert in interior designing?? As far as I know, you are a fucking lawyer Sarah!” Abby continued “And did you ever thought about how we’ll feel? About how Carol will feel? Carol, your freaking _lover_ , was the head designer for that project! Do you know how bitchy your move is??!”

At this point, Sarah also stood up.

“I told you, I just told her my opinion about the house! As far as I know, it is not illegal to express one’s opinion!”

“Stick in defending your criminals, Sarah! I don’t need your fucking opinion!”

Sarah was about to speak once more, but Carol entered the kitchen with wet hair and wearing only her robe.

“What in the world is going on here?!” Carol was exasperated with all the shouting she heard while she was in the shower.

Abby and Sarah stood frozen in their places.

“Both of you are grown-ups shouting at each other in front of my child!” Carol continued “When Harge and I broke up, I promised Rindy that she will not live in a place where people are shouting and hating on each other!”

At this point, both Abby and Sarah is already sitting back on their chair.

“And I will not let that promise be broken by the two of you!” Carol then looked around and noticed that Rindy was missing “Where the hell is Rindy??”

“I saw her go to her room.” Abby said softly as she calms her emotions and at the same time, they heard Rindy yelled "Mommy I'm in my room!".

“I will go to my child and see to it that she’s okay. I will finish my shower and get dressed. I’ll deal with the both of you later….” Carol said firmly and went to Rindy’s room.

Sarah just shrugged her shoulders and held the newspaper by her face to resume reading.

_What a bitch!_

Abby decided that she will not wait for Carol and face her wrath that morning, so after Carol stormed off the kitchen, she went home. She still reeks of alcohol and needs a bath, after all, she needs to go to the office feeling fresh. She took a cab going to her apartment not far from Carol’s building. When she reached her apartment, she took a warm bath and got dressed taking all time in the world.

When she arrived at her office, it was almost lunch time. She and Carol co-own and co-manage a medium sized Interior designing firm. Abby is the head of accounts and finance which deals with maintaining relationships with existing clients and at the same time looking for new clients. While Carol is the head of the Artistic Department, they deal with the final designs and products of the firm.

“Good morning Abigail, you are late” it was her secretary Mrs. Paulson, an old widow who helps her to somewhat become organize for almost ten years now.

“I know Mrs. Paulson. And also, I co-own this firm, please keep that in mind” this is their morning ritual, Mrs. Paulson will note that Abby is late, Abby will utter similar statement about owning the company, and Mrs. Paulson will just shake her head and chuckle.

“You have couple of messages waiting for your response” Mrs. Paulson, is now setting a cup of coffee on her desk.

“Something important?” she asked.

“Mostly invitations to parties by our clients and some design proposals that needs your approval”

“Do they already have Carol’s approval?” Carol is after all the head of the art department, she made it clear that she will not approve any designs unless it has a go signal coming from Carol. Mrs. Paulson nodded as a response.

“Very well. I’ll see to it that I’ll answer each one of them by the end of the day” she said as she removed her blazer and rolled her sleeves up.

 “And also, Carol said that you should come to her office ASAP.”

Abby let out an exaggerated and audible sigh. She can’t deal with drama for now.

“Tell her that I’m busy right now. Tell her that I’ll call her later this day. What else?”

“You also have a meeting with the accounts team starting in 30 minutes.”

"And please don't forget to take your vitamins Abigail. We don't want you getting sick..." Mrs. Paulson quickly added.

“Thank you Mrs. Paulson” she said after having another sip from her cup

Mrs. Paulson nodded her head as a response and left her alone without uttering a single word.

Throughout the day our heroine was inside a conference room having a meeting with her department, their sales are a bit down comparing it with last year’s. It was already 3 in the afternoon when Carol called Abby’s cell phone, but the latter would rather deal with the numbers in front of her than to talk to her friend about Sarah right now. She rejected the call and texted back that she’s still in a meeting and that she will call her back right after. After 30 minutes, Carol was once again calling her, still she didn’t accept the call

 _I’m sorry Carol. I’m still in a meeting. I’ll call you back I promise._  

She texted Carol and turned her cell phone off. The meeting goes on for another 3 more hours, when it is done it was already past 6 in the evening. Abby was about to go home when she turn her cellphone on. After the booting, her cellphone immediately buzzed continuously because of the many messages that it was receiving. This goes on for a minute or two then Abby looked at the messages, it was all from Carol. Our heroine then decided to call Carol back, it was picked up on the first ring…

“Hello?” she said

“Are you with Rindy?!” Carol sounded frantic, almost screaming, it stunned her.

“Geez. You don’t have to ---“

“Abby! Please tell me that Rindy is with you!” she heard anxiety, fear and desperation on her friend’s voice “Please Abby!”

“No—No, she is not with me. I was in a meeting all afternoon” at this point she heard Carol sobbing out loud on the other line. “What’s going on??”

“She told me that--- that she was in a meeting and --- that she forgot---” Carol managed to say in between sobs.

“Carol, calm down, tell me. What the fuck is going on??!”

A beat.

“Oh Abby, Rindy is missing!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sarah's a bitch. There I said it. :)


	8. Run Therese, Run!

**Monday**

**9:17 AM**

In the horizon ahead, gulls are flying low beneath the layers of white clouds almost touching the blue waters of the ocean. I can see a woman standing by the shore line, her bare feet playing with the contact of waves dancing on the golden sand. Shying away from the distance, a child is running towards the woman, screaming and shouting her heart out with glee. I still can’t see the face of the child but somehow, I know that it was Rindy. I can feel that my heart is full of longing and craving to lift the child into my arms, to shower the little girl with kisses. At this moment, I suddenly heard a loud alarm screaming by my ears.

_Something is definitely wrong._

I saw the woman by the beach panicking and running towards Rindy but she can’t seem to move an inch towards the child. I started to worry and feel apprehension invading my thoughts then I decided to run towards Rindy too but with some freaky force of nature, I too, like the woman, can’t close the distance between us. But nevertheless, although breathless I didn’t stop running until one misstep cause me to tumble down.

I jolted awake on my bed, my alarm clock screaming.

 

**11:33 AM**

I woke up again with Thor’s hammer pounding on my head. An unwelcome taste of something strong was dancing at the back of my dry throat. Standing up from my bed has never been this difficult. My vision and stomach are spinning like a choreographed ballet dance with lots of pirouettes in it. As I try to steady both my visuals and balance it hits - an acidic bitterness shoots up my throat. I ran towards my bathroom, not minding the thumps on my head in every step I make. Head in hands, I was coughing and swearing my heart out. I looked into the black poison I spewed out, checking if I accidentally gagged my soul too. With a heaviest head, I cleaned up the mess that I made in my bathroom, leaving a foul stench and worse taste. I went back to my bed, letting the dizziness subside, I closed my eyes and uttered the oldest of all promises that are meant to be broken

“Never again...”

**1:23 PM**

The screams of my cellphone’s ringtone woke me up for the third time that morning. I tried not to mind it by hitting the silent function of my cell. Knowing that I don’t need to report to the office this day, with my head still pounding in pain, I tried to go back to bed. Maybe if I hide so far under the covers and duvets, this tiny man will stop playing the bongo drum on my brain. Whoever said that breaking up is the hardest thing to do must have not experienced a hangover.

**2:04 PM**

I can’t go back to sleep but I stayed on my bed with my eyes closed not moving an inch to subside my headache when, again, I felt my phone vibrate. I slowly opened my eyes, the brightness of the room immediately sends shooting pain to my eyes then to my head. It was Dannie who was calling, probably he’s going to ask for updates about my baby sitting gig. I didn’t answer, I am not in the right state of mind to have a conversation right now. I am just going to call him later.

_Get up, Belivet! Get up, self!_

I keep telling myself. I need to, after all, work on my assignment today; I decided that I’ll visit a play park to take some snaps of children playing. When I have successfully left my bed, I went straight to kitchen to replenish and hydrate.  I drank five glasses of water so quickly that I cannot breathe. I have staggered over to the sink just to, yet again, puke my insides. I stepped inside the shower and stood under the water, not moving an inch, until I started to feel human. Then I remembered; I remember the question, I remember the kiss, and I remember the lipstick. My lips curl, my cheeks rise, my eyes blush and my teeth hide, remembering a happy memory helped me through that hell.

I was looking for my favorite camera, Poppy, when it dawned on me that I left it back at Carol’s apartment.

_I guess I just have to swing by at their apartment later this day._

I chose one of my camera to use; it is digital and automatic unlike my favorite but it will do for the task at hand. Wearing a flannel long sleeves over my favorite band t-shirt, ripped jeans, a baseball cap, and the darkest and largest sunglasses that I own, I casually set off to my quest towards the nearest park.

 

**3:16 PM**

I found myself sitting in a burger joint somewhere along Lexington Avenue drinking my strong black coffee and waiting hungrily for my food. Across the street is the park, I can see that there are children playing merrily perfect for snapping photos. Not far from where I was sitting, I saw a day care with a playground full of children playing, I can snap some pictures there too. But feeding myself is more important right now. While waiting, I called Dannie and told him what happened yesterday. I told him about how Rindy and I got along and how Abby and I got drunk. I left the details about Carol; the tea, the shirt, the kiss and the mark.  I would like to savour the memories alone for now. My food arrived and I have to end the call with Dannie. As soon as the food was set down in front of me, I have devoured my burger and fries like a beast who hasn’t been able to eat for weeks.

 

**3:49 PM**

After eating, I just immediately vomited that magnificent burger. I thought that grease was one of the best cure for hangover, I suppose that I was just wrong. Anyways, so I decided to snap photos by the day care first; still wearing my baseball cap and my sunglasses, I was in a squat position trying to snap pictures of random children playing when a woman approached me

“What do you think you are doing?” the brunette woman with pink face and a rather heavy built said towards me with her hands placed on her waist.

“Excuse me?” I answered.

“I said, what do you think you are doing?!” the woman was clearly aggravated but I don’t know about what.

“I’m just trying to take pictures Ma’am” I said very calmly

“Pictures of what?”

“Of-- of the children” puzzlement was very obvious in my tone.

“That’s what I thought! Give the pictures to me!” the woman is now hysterical.

Distraught about what’s happening to this woman before me, I was only able to utter “Wha—what?”

“Give the pictures to me YOU CREEEEP!” the woman shouted, making her face redder. People around us are starting to take notice about our rather loud conversation. I shook my head in disbelief. Then she tried to grab my camera from my hand, which of course I tried to dodge it.

“What’s wrong with you woman?!” I shouted back as I was dodging her hands.

“I hate Paedophiles like you, abusing the carefree innocence of children playing in the park!”

“Whoa whoa whoa! I ain’t a paedo lady! I’m a photographer! I am just doing my job! Please get off of me!” by this point she was abled to grab one of my hand.

“Photographer my ass! You don’t look like one! You creeps should get a life!”

Luckily, I was able to free myself from her grasps and l literally ran as fast as I could away from her. I only stopped running when I felt that my chest was constricting with pain, I know that I didn’t get that far because I was still able to hear the woman shout profane statements against me.

_God, Im unfit!_

**4:24 PM**

After that incident with the woman, I found myself wandering around the park. I bought myself some coffee and sat in one of the vacant benches. I can feel cold sweats running down my spine and I was shivering. Thinking that I was still shook about that peculiar event, I lit a cigarette trying to calm my nerves. I don’t actually enjoy coffee, I would rather prefer tea over coffee, yet I gulped it down sip by sip. Cigarettes on the other hand, although I know it is not healthy for me, is what I enjoy the most. That whenever I run out, I see to it that I will immediately buy another pack. It is rather odd that whenever someone smoke cigarettes, they look pitiful. Whenever someone sip coffee, they look exhausted. But if you do it at the same time, smoking and drinking coffee, it creates the best image. It exhumes the perception of being cool, clever, dangerous and mysterious. Perfect for subject of a photo. Many people say that there are 2 subjects in photography; the good and the bad. There are also the appropriate subjects and inappropriate ones. I don’t agree with them. For me, photography is all about the lighting and clarity, and the depth of emotions and of course, the story.

To burn time, I decided to review the photos that I snapped. I thought that my photos were pretty good but not good enough to be published. Although the technical aspects of the photos are right; like the lighting, angle, contrast and all, but I wasn’t able to capture the depth of the emotions of the children. I still have a few days left before my meeting with Gen on Thursday, I hope by then I can see my progress. As I was scanning my photos, I noticed that there was a girl wearing a red coat sitting on a bench at the background of several pictures that I have taken. I pressed the function of the camera to zoom in on the background, the shots were not focused on her so the face of the girl was blurry. I stared at the blurry face of the girl on my camera screen, and I felt a certain peculiar familiarity towards her. 

_Rindy?_

**4:56 PM**

I decided to go back to the place where I took the photos, risking the fact that I can cross path with the woman again. Thankfully I didn’t. Seeing that the playground was already deserted except for a guard sleeping while and the little girl with a red coat on who was sitting on the swing made my heart ache. Her back was facing me so I was still unsure if this was indeed Rindy. With my heart thumping like a nervous potato I approached the kid.

“Rindy?” I asked.

The child turned around making my heart swell with relief, it was indeed Rindy.

“Therese!” she said as she ran towards me and hugged me by the waist.

“What are you doing here so late?”

“I’m waiting for Aunt Sarah, she’s going to pick me up.”

“What time is she coming?”

“I don’t know. She was supposed to be here when we say goodbye to teacher”

I approached the sleeping guard, woke him up and asked what time did the “class” of Rindy ended.

“Around 2 in the afternoon” the guard said.

So, Rindy was already waiting for Aunt Sarah for 2 and a half hours. At that moment, I was fuming with rage towards Aunt Sarah.

I immediately took my phone out from the pocket of my pants, noticing that it is low on battery charge I dialled Carol’s number. No answer. Then I tried calling Abby, it just went straight to her voicemail.

“Well, I think I’ll just wait here with you for Aunt Sarah too” I told Rindy.

I heard her made a squealing sound out of delight.

 

**6:07 PM**

While waiting, Rindy and I frolicked around the playground. We alternately push each other on the swings, rode the see-saw together and even went to ride the “big slide” together, because Rindy was so afraid to do it alone. In between, I managed to capture some candid shots of Rindy laughing her heart out or pointing something that caught her attention. An hour passed there was still no sign of Aunt Sarah, I was about to call Carol once more but my phone ran out of battery. Then I noticed Rindy looking a little tired and sleepy, I decided that I will just have to get her home.

“Rindy, let’s get you home” the moment I said it, by my peripheral vision, I saw that brunette woman again approaching us… fast.

“Hey Rindy! Come here, get away from that creep!” the woman said

“Hey lady! It’s okay, she knows me.” I said to her calmly.

“Rindy, come here! I’ll take you home to Carol. Don’t go with that creep!” the woman said grabbing the child by the hand. In some freak of nature, this crazy woman knows Carol and Rindy.

I heard the child say “Ouch” prompting me to “mildly” shove the woman away from her. I carried Rindy on my arm, but the woman was insistently grabbing her from me.

“Hey stop it! You’re hurting her!” I shouted at the woman.

“Mrs. Robichiek, it is okay, I know her!” Rindy also shouted.

But the woman, or should I say Mrs. Robichiek, was still trying to grab Rindy from my arm while I was swatting her every attempt with my free hand. We were struggling for a while, but when I saw a moment of opportunity to flee from the scene, I took it. For the second time that day, but this time I have a camera and a 5 year old wrapped around my neck, I ran away as fast as I could from the very same woman.

“AAAHH! She’s running after us!” Rindy screamed at my ears. And indeed, as I looked back, I saw the middle aged, red faced, and heavy woman running after us. Feeling my adrenaline pumping through my veins and the spirit of Usain Bolt invading my body, I ran towards the direction of their apartment.

 

**6:33 PM**

I only managed to stop running when we were in front of Carol’s building. It was the first time that I ran that fast and that far in my life; I always thank god for my natural petite physique cause physical activities is my Achilles’ heel. Breathing heavily and sweats all over my body, I knocked on their apartment door. While waiting for someone to answer the door I noticed that Rindy was already sleeping on my arms sucking her thumb with her head nuzzled to my sweaty neck. Adrenaline wearing off, I can feel the weight of Rindy and the distance that I just ran slowly taking its toll on my body. Panting like an old dog, I knocked once again. Suddenly, the door swung open revealing a crying Carol.

“RINDY!” 

Without glancing at me, she quickly but gently snatched Rindy away from my arms into hers. She was kissing and whispering gently to the child as she entered their apartment, leaving the door open and me outside. I don’t care if Carol doesn’t want me there or what, but my mouth was so dry that I walked inside and went directly into the kitchen. I drank several glasses of water that I almost drowned when the water went in to the wrong pipe. After quenching my thirst, I went to the living room. I removed my shoes and my flannel long sleeves, leaving my sweat stained Arctic Monkeys t-shirt on. That marathon that I just did took its toll on me, my arms were aching, my back was throbbing with pain, I can’t feel my legs and my head was spinning, so I lay down on the sofa, not giving a care if Carol would mind. I just have to shut my eyes for a few minutes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is going to be a loooonng night. ;)


	9. Delusion, Illusion, Confusion

“Is she dead?”

I don’t know how long I was out but hearing Rindy’s voice woke me up to reality that I was crashing at Carol’s sofa – unable to move, to speak nor to open my eyes.

“No sweet pea, she’s just exhausted I suppose” I can hear Carol’s muffled voice replying to Rindy, she must be in the kitchen.

Then suddenly I felt something poking me on my side.

“She’s shaking Mommy.” Only at that instance that I noticed my body was shivering involuntarily and I was cold AF.

I heard Rindy panicking but the poking continues “Come here and check on her Mommy. I don’t want her to be dead!”

I wanted to open my eyes and get up to reassure the little girl that I am not dead but it felt that I was paralyzed and I can’t move.

I heard Carol footsteps shuffling towards the living room,

“Oh honey, stop poking her!”

Then I feel that someone was softly shaking my shoulders…

“Therese? Wake up, dinner’s ready…” she softly said. God knows how much I wanted to open my eyes to have a look at the mystical creature in front of me, but universe has its own plan for I was too weak to open my eyes and I just gave a faint grunt instead. I felt a soft palm placed against my forehead going down towards my cheeks, its warmth slowly flooding through me. When the hand was withdrawn from my skin, all the coldness and iciness came back…

“Co—co-o-old” I managed to utter and I was shocked that I sounded so weak.

I heard Carol click her tongue while Rindy was screaming in relief

“Yay! You did it Mommy! Therese is alive!”

“Not quite Snowflake. We still need to nurse her back to health. Stay here with her.” I heard Carol’s footsteps hurriedly go somewhere in the apartment.

“Therese? Are you alive again?” Rindy asked me. Still unable to lift my lids up, I chuckled and replied weakly with a smile

“I am”

“I’m glad!” then Rindy hugged me but immediately removed her embraced

“Ouch. Therese you are hot!” Rindy said to me then shouted towards Carol “Mommy, Therese is hot!”

“Yes, I know darling.” I heard Carol spoke beside me, she must be kneeling by the sofa. “Here. Take this, it will help you a little bit” she handed me a pill and a glass of water that I immediately drank then she wrapped me with a blanket, I inhaled deeply and her intoxicating scent once again danced with my senses slowly putting me to slumber.

\---

I was awakened by the sudden cries of the doorbell, I heard Carol’s footsteps hurrying towards the door.

“WHERE IS SHE GODDAMN IT?!”

It was Abby.

“Hello there, Rindy is in the living room---” I heard Carol said.

I tried to open my eyes and to my relief I was able to do it. Still shivering and clutching the blanket by my chin I looked around me and I saw Rindy playing with Mr. and Mrs. Periwinkle by my feet.

“No not Rindy. Where is that good for nothing son of a bitch?!” Abby continued, truly agitated by what happened. I still can’t see them from where I was lying down so it is most probable that they were still in the foyer.

“Abby calm do---“ Carol said calmly.

“I’ll fucking smack her fucking face! I know that face is magnificent but I will destroy it!”

“Abby calm down.”

“Why are you so fucking calm?”

“Because Rindy is already here with Therese---”

“You should ditch her Carol! I don’t care if she is ‘mind blowing in bed’! You told me yourself, your words not mine.”

“Abby! Language! Rindy can fucki—fu--- fudging hear you for fuck’s sake! Oh jesus Christ, I can’t even--”

“I am willing to become a martyr and become your little fuck toy as long as you dump her gorgeous ass right now!”

“ABIGAIL!!”

Then I heard Abby laugh “I was only kidding. But I am dead serious about the dumping thing. Dump her Carol, you should have done it months ago!”

Then I heard them walk towards the living room…

 “Are you done with your adult talk?” Rindy asked them.

I heard Abby chuckled and saw that she lifted Rindy from the sofa into her arms.

“Yes you little stink hole! Oh god, you’re getting heavy. What happened to you by the way?” She said as she put Rindy down again on the floor. Rindy gave her a short recitation about the tale that happened earlier. I sat up on the sofa still clenching the blanket by my chin, I can feel all my energy being drained on that action alone.

 “And what is this? What happened to Belivet?” she quickly added pointing towards me.

“Mommy said Therese is hot” rindy said.

“I see--- ” I saw Abby slowly gave a sly smile to Carol. Carol, on the other hand, blushed as a red tomato.

“Oh you nitwit, Therese is down with a fever!”

“What?” Abby and I both exclaimed.

“You have a fever Therese” Carol affirmed.

“No, no, no, impossible. It was only a--- a hangover.”

I heard Abby and Carol chuckled

“I took your temperature darling. You have a fever alright. Don’t worry, it is quite high actually, but I'm sure that it will go down later this night” the older blonde said.

 “I should go home then…” I tried to stand up but the 3 of them, Carol Abby and Rindy, simultaneously pushed me back to the sofa.

“--Oh no Belivet. You should stay here for a while.”

“--Therese you can stay here, Sugar Plum Fairy will help you get well”

“—I won’t let you go home like that Therese!”

They were talking to me at the same time that made my head ache and dizzy that I started to rub my forehead.

“I’ll try to fix you some soup… I think I have something from a while ago” Carol stood up and went to the kitchen leaving us in the living room.

“I better help her, she can’t cook.” Abby said with a smirk written on her face “Rindy, stay here with Therese alright?” then she stood up and followed Carol into the kitchen.

Rindy then merrily started explaining in details the different fairy powers of Sugar Plum Fairy. The next thing I knew, I dozed off once again.

\---

I've been slipping in and out of consciousness for god knows how long. When I woke up from my slumber once again, I was coughing my lungs out. I coughed so many times I feel a 6-pack coming in.

“Are you okay?” I heard Carol calling me from the kitchen.

“Yes.” My voice was hoarse because of all the coughing but I was feeling slightly better than before. It somehow passed my mind that a cigarette will make it easier to breathe. Sometimes all I need is a little more substance, some sort of reason to keep the air coming into my weak and tired body. Despite the very little protest from my brain, I stood up from the sofa and went outside the balcony dragging the blanket. I sat on one of the chairs outside and looked up the sky, I noticed that there were no twinkling lights to brighten that autumn night. I took my cigarette pack and lighter from the back pocket of my pants, and took one crumpled cigarette. I immediately place it on my lips and lit it without thinking. I took deep long drag that made me cough and gasp for air. Suddenly, Carol snatched the cigarette from my finger and took it to her own lips. She took a long drag and played with the smoke in her mouth before inhaling it.

“You shouldn’t smoke” she said as she exhales the smoke and took the other seat adjacent to mine.

I saw that her lipstick stained the filter of my cigarette, where my mouth has been. It was the same shade of the mark that I saw on my chest last night. This thought made me blush like a school girl. I can still taste the cigarette on my breath and feel the way it's destroying my lungs slowly just like how she do every time she looks at me. Her piercing grey eyes staring back at me made me forget how to breathe. She took another drag and took the seat beside me. Seeing that she was enjoying the cigarette, I took out another one from my pack and lit it.

After sometime of just sitting there in silence she asked me

“It’s awfully quiet right?”

Still can’t control my shivering, I nodded as a response.

“Silence is all I wanted, or so I thought. But now that I finally have silence all I want is to hear Rindy’s voice. The silence becomes too unusual without having her around” she said before having a long drag of her cigarette.

“She’s a very smart girl. Very outspoken. She speaks her mind. Tactless but charming… that’s what I like about her” I said smiling.

“Really?” she laughed and added “I guess she got it from Abby…”

“Where are they by the way?” I quivered because of the cold and held the blanket over my body tightly.

“Abby took Rindy home with her. Spontaneous bonding of the ‘ _cool girls_ ’ they said” she chuckled.                                                                                                                                                                                 

“By the way Carol, I’m sorry about awhile ago” she looked at me with puzzlement written all over her face.

“About the running thing with Mrs. Robichiek…” I continued.

“Ah. You’re quite runner” she gave me a wink

“I didn’t know what’s gotten over me. I tried calling you and then that woman.. err.. Mrs. Robichiek was stressing me out the whole afternoon, I told her that I was just taking pictures but she was a huge pain in my ass and then there was this headache that’s been bugging me the whole ---” I stopped myself from ranting when I felt that Carol was just staring at me with a face with bewilderment or amusement or something that I just can’t read.

“Ahm. My point is that I am sorry. Truly. I didn’t thought about the consequences of my actions that affected you. Seeing you with puffy and red eyes made me feel so guilty.” I looked at her searching for a reaction but she was just staring at me wide eyed.

“I shouldn’t have took Rindy away from there. I am truly sorry Carol” at this instance I looked directly into her eyes as she looked at mine.

“I confess, when Mrs. Robichiek called me that some Pedophile took Rindy I was distraught, I didn’t know what to do…” she said while still looking directly at me with a little faint smile on her face.

“But it is not you who should be doing the apologizing Therese” this time she averted her gaze. I saw that her eyes became a darker shade of grey and her face is now as dim as the sky above. She then took a long drag from her cigarette.

We haven't spoken in a while. Who knew that silence could be so deafening and yet so comforting at the same time?

“I should probably go home now” I uttered quietly with a strain on my voice.

I heard her chuckle.

“What?” I asked her while trembling.

“I can see why Rindy speaks so highly of you. Both of you are stubborn” she said with a mischievous smile that making the butterflies in my stomach flutter by. I was about to took another drag from my cigarette to calm my nerves when she stood up and swiped the cigarette from my mouth. Then she threw it over the balcony with her own cigarette butt.

“You’re not going anywhere in that state Miss” she said and added “Come, you need to rest”.

She reached out and took my hand. Holding her hand is like having the vast universe within my palm. Between our fingers that were laced together was where sparks fly like falling stars. With our fingers entwined like planets, she led me towards her room then into her bed. She motioned me to lay down but I was reluctant. She must have sensed my hesitancy and told me

“It’s okay Therese. I’m going to sleep in Rindy’s. Go to bed”

Like a love sick puppy I obeyed her orders and lay down on the bed. When I was settled, she left me for a while and when she came back she had a basin of water and a piece of cloth. She pressed her palm on my forehead and clicked her tongue as if discovering something unflattering for her taste. She then dipped the cloth to the water then proceeded to gently wipe my body with it. First my forehead, then my cheeks, then my neck. I know that she was about to go down to my chest… God knows how much I wanted her to do just that. But she hesitated and withdrew her hand then continued on my arms. When she was done, she tucked me in, said her goodnight and left the room.

\---

I was sleeping on my side and was awaken when I felt that something was watching me. I opened my eyes I saw that Carol was beside me on the bed and her face was just an inch away from me. What was she doing while I was asleep? That I didn’t know, but all I know is that I’d kill to have that face in front of me in every single waking moment of my life.

“Oh. I didn’t mean to disturb you. But Rindy’s bed was awfully too short for my height.” she said

“You didn’t. I… Nightmare” I told her with my strained voice.

She begun to gently stroke my hair and said "It'll be alright, I am here. Go to sleep". The she started to run her fingers on my arm and began to hum…

Her voice has this serenity that calms me through. With my eyes closed, I can hear her voice resounding, I can feel it comforting. As she continues to hum, the melody became more and more familiar but the title lingered on the tip of my tongue

Not moving an inch I whispered “I know this…”

She just quickly shushed me as a reply. Then she continued but this time she sang it…

 

 

> _I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream_
> 
> _I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam_
> 
> _And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem_
> 
> _But if I know you, I know what you'll do_
> 
> _You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream_

 

“Ha. I knew it!” I chuckled.

“I love this…” she just softly said and continued to hum it.

“You have a lovely voice”

I can hear her soft chuckles and then she followed it with “You’re a terrible liar”

I wish I knew the lullabies that was sung to her. Then, I'll sing them to her, hoping it'll bring at least a moment of peace in her world. But alas, I cannot sing. So, I just made a wish that I could be even just one of the lullabies that she has always loved. I wish that I could be even just this particular song… at least she could love me by then.

I opened my eyes and my gaze was immediately met by Carol’s. I don’t know if it is because of the sickness that I have but I suddenly felt a sudden surge of confidence and courage

“Can I kiss you goodnight?” I asked.

“No.” she simply said.

“Why not?”

“I don’t want to catch that terrible fever”

“Well, your face is just an inch away and you’re laying very close to me right now.”

“Yes, I am” she said in a matter in fact voice.

“That doesn’t make any sense… ”

“Nothing makes sense when you are delirious with high fever darling”

“I’m not delirious. I’ve never been more awake in my life!”

“You just told me that I’m a good singer--”

“Cause it’s the truth!”

“--Might as well send you to the hospital in the morning”

“Fine.” I said as I shuffle my position on the bed to turn my back to her.

“Thank you for letting me stay here. I’ll be out of your hair first thing in the morning.” I quickly added trying to hide the hurt in my voice.

Suddenly, I felt her arms were wrapping me around my waist. Her embrace strong, comforting and making her warmth entangles around me. I can feel her breath on my neck, I can feel her heartbeats on my back. My chest is heavy, my heart is a racing a mile a minute. I can no longer breathe.

“Relax Therese. Just go to sleep” she whispered by my ear.  

“Too bad I never did have that soup of yours…” I whispered moments later.

I can feel her breath by my neck and her body’s vibrations as she chuckles.

The next thing I knew her lips were tenderly pressed by my nape making all the hairs on my back stand. I caressed her arms as she tighten her embrace on me.

 ---

I didn’t know how and when I fell asleep but the moment I woke up early next morning, my fever was gone and so was Carol. The other side of the bed was empty and there was no sign of her anywhere in the room. I was repeatedly asking myself if it was all real or it was just a hallucination. If it was just a dream, I'd rather dream all my life away just to relieve that moment. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Struggled with this chapter I was on vacation for a week and this was my first take on fluff, hope i did well. As usual, apologies for the flaws didn't have time nor the patience to edit it. ;)


	10. Blonde War

"I sat up on the bed and looked around the room. With the autumn morning light dimly illuminating the vast expanse of the room I was able to appreciate its simple elegance. I looked beside me and noticed a picture frame place on the bedside table with a studio picture of Carol and a rather younger version of Rindy. It was quite a good picture actually both of them were smiling and looking at the camera. (Well, I think that every photo of Carol is a work of art and a masterpiece) But I think that the photographer failed to capture the realness and genuineness of their smile in the photo; I thought that they look rather tense in the picture. I placed the frame back to the bedside table and I thought of an idea to something to Carol as a sign thanks.

I heard my stomach growled and my throat was very dry. I realized that I haven’t eaten any dinner last night. Very carefully I marched towards the kitchen to get a glass of water, tiptoeing trying not to make a noise. I saw a note placed on top of the kitchen counter with the messy cursive script that I assumed was Carol’s

 

 

 

> _Therese,_
> 
> _I just went out to get some breakfast. Is blueberry pancake okay with you? I hope you’re not allergic to berries. There is a shirt and a toothbrush that you can use in the bathroom._
> 
> _Please make yourself at home. I’ll be back in a jiffy._
> 
> _Carol_

 

I looked at the shirt that I was wearing, it was still my Arctic Monkeys t-shirt, thinking that I slept with it made me cringed. So I decided to have a quick shower. True to the note, there’s a t-shirt waiting for me inside the bathroom. It was a brown one with a face of Chewbacca printed on it. After my shower, I looked around the living room to find my stuffs; cellphone and camera. I saw them place on top of the coffee table. Then I remembered about Mr. Poppy so I went to Rindy’s bedroom to look for it. I found it neatly placed on her bedside table and thought that I can just give it to Rindy, so I just took out the film carefully and placed the camera back to the table.

I was answering some e-mails about work stuffs when the doorbell rang. Thinking that it was Carol, I almost ran towards the door to open it. To my dismay, it was not her but before me was a woman wearing her dirty blonde hair on a high bun and had a black pant suit on. I looked at her straight into her blue-eyes and wondered how such a perfect person could be created.

“Who are you?” she said with obvious irritation in her voice snapping me out of my reverie.

“What?” I answered. Instead of replying she just shoved me aside and made her way inside the apartment. I ran after her.

“Excuse me. I need you to step outside now.” I said very firmly but still my voice sounded weak.

At this moment, the blonde was already sitting on the sofa and smoking and not giving me a single attention.

I stepped in front of her.

“Hi excuse me, what are you doing? Who are you?” I said to her.

“Smoking” she said raising her cigarette “Who are you?”

“I asked you first…”

She chuckled.

“Sarah” she said before having another drag of her cigarette.

“Oh…”

Hearing her say her name made me flinch. Seeing the person that you’ve been hating since yesterday in person was kind of surreal. I was imagining various scenes wherein I’ll be doing some several speeches scolding her about responsibilities but it seems that I just caught my tongue while standing in front of her.

“And who are you?” she said.

“Hi. I’m Therese ---“ I tried extending my hand for her to shake but she just cut me off.

“---Ah. The nanny! I heard so much about you” She chuckled.

“What are you doing here this early?” She asked me and started to look around while sitting down on the couch.

“Ahmmm---“

“--- I’ve been calling Carol since yesterday. She was not answering her phone. Where’s she by the way?” she’s becoming restless on the sofa.

“She just ---“

At this moment, she turned to look at me.

“--- Where’s Rindy? Wait.” She paused for a moment and I thought that she was actually waiting for my replies but before I can answer her she continued “Did you just got off the shower?”

“Ahm. Yes, how ---“ My palms were already sweating because of this interrogation.

“---Is that Carol’s t-shirt?” she was already standing and taking a step towards me.

“Why yes ----“ she keeps cutting me off and it is already infuriating me.

She then turned her back on me and marched towards Carol’s bedroom. I followed her. Inside the room she immediately went towards bed. She chuckled.

“Already made it up huh?” she said to me. She then started to lift the pillows one by one as if she’s looking for something.

“What are you doing?” I asked her but as if she heard nothing she just continued to rummage the bed.

“Ah ha!” she suddenly stopped and faced me.

“Are you sleeping with her?” her voice was calm but her face was already bright red. She was actually crazy scary at this moment to be honest.

 “Whaaaat?” I managed to utter. Her question caught me off guard that I literally took a step back from her.

“I asked you if you’re sleeping with Carol?” still with her calm voice she was slowly walking towards me.

How I wish that I was really sleeping with her but technically we did sleep together last night. But a life or death situation like that doesn’t requires a witty answer.

“I am not!” was what I answered. I saw her eyes squint a little. I felt that as if she has her hands around my neck and tightening her grip to extract an honest answer.

“I swear to god! We didn’t have sex!” I added. Hoping that she will somewhat believe me.

“Then what the hell is this?” her voice was still calm then she held out something between her index finger and thumb that appears to be a thread or something.

“What the fuck is that?” I managed to ask.

“This, my sweet angel Therese, is a hair strand.” sarcasm was on point with that one “ and I believe that this is yours”

I just have to tell her the truth.

“Sarah…” I sighed “I slept here—on that bed. But Carol and I didn’t have sex. I swear. She just let me stay the night because I had a fever last night. Please believe me. Okay?”

Assessing if I was telling the truth, she squinted her eyes.

“Remove your shirt” she said.

“What?”

“You want me to believe in what you just said?”

I nodded.

“Then remove the shirt.” She said.

I just want to get it over with so I followed, I removed the shirt leaving my bra on.

“There. Now what?” Puzzled but I just let her do thing

She closed the distance between us.

“Carol likes to mark her territory…” she said before looking closely on my neck and my chest as if she’s inspecting something.

 The silence between us was deafening and I was so tensed that I was holding my breath.

“What is happening here?” hearing Carol almost made me jumped out of my skin.

“Are you sleeping with her?” Sarah asked her. I was dead frozen on my place, wide eyed I looked at Carol who just chuckled.

“You have some fucking nerve throwing accusations at me Sarah.” she said before walking out of the room.

“Answer me Carol!!” for the first time, Sarah shouted then followed her, closing the door behind her.

Left alone in the room, I put on the t-shirt and decided that I have to leave the apartment immediately. I just have to quietly sneak out of there, I don’t have enough social skill nor energy to deal with a war between two hot blondes. I need to go to the living room to retrieve my camera and my phone undetected. Mustering up the courage, I took a deep breath and I opened the door. Instantly I heard Carol and Sarah’s raised voices. I thanked god that they were in the kitchen, it is much easier to get out of there unnoticed.

“--- were you last night Sarah? Huh? Forgetting about Rindy?”

“How many times do I have to tell you that I got trapped in a meeting?!”

“Thank god Therese happened to be in the area last night or else Rindy will be ---“

 “Yeah! Thank god! Is that why you fucked her???! Tell me Carol!”

At this moment, I have already retrieved my things in the living room and was already on my way to the door. _I need to get out of here fast_ was all that I was thinking.

“Sarah don’t make this about me. Don’t you go ‘lawyering’ at me right now” you can really detect the frustrations in Carol’s voice.

“’ _Oh you have to meet Therese, she has this doe like features that is so charming_ ’” Sarah said equipped with a mocking voice. But it made my heart swell, hearing that Carol talked about me.

“Stop it---“

I was already at the foyer.

“Is that why you can’t stop talking about her---“

“Stop it Sarah!” annoyance was in Carol’s voice.

 “Because you were already sleeping with her! Who is she to you?? Why can’t you answer Carol? Tell me… tell me!”

My hand was already on the door knob.

“SHE IS JUST A NANNY! SHE IS NOTHING TO ME!” Carol shouted.

I was frozen on my tracks. My hearing seemed to stop functioning after those last words because all I can hear was buzzing. A beat then I managed to open the door but to my surprise Abby with Rindy on her arms was already outside about to ring the doorbell.

“Therese, you’re alive!” Rindy exclaimed but before I can reply we heard another series of shouting between Sarah and Carol.

“What the fuu--- What is going on?” Abby asked while putting Rindy down.

“I – I have to go” was the only thing that I can say before running passed them towards the elevator. I heard Rindy call my name but I didn’t have the strength to look back to the little blonde. When the elevator door opened, I calmly stepped inside, the operator asked if I was going down to the lobby and I nodded as a reply. When the elevator closed its doors that was when I began to weep like a child. Giving not a single care to the operator who was already asking me if something was wrong.

Hearing Carol’s words were like knives that cut me open. It hurts and it annoyed me because being hurt means pain. Knowing that you can only be hurt by the ones you love annoyed me even worse. Then I went back to my apartment, sulked all day by developing some photos then I called Dannie, told me that he’s not available. Then I called you. So here we are.”

“Wow. I don’t know what to say Therese, I’m sorry. It is all shocking.” Gen managed to utter.

It was only around 6 pm but they are already sitting on a booth next to a glass window facing the road at Gen’s favorite bar drinking beer. Therese was already a little tipsy.

“Everyone told me that fire was dangerous. But no one told me that she was a synonym for fire and now my heart has first degree burns…”

“Don’t you go poetic on me Belivet!” Gen quickly added “All you have to do is just forget about her”

Therese chuckled.

“I just can’t believe it…” Gen said after having a swing of her beer.

“Right? Riiiight?”

“I just can’t believe it that you called Dannie before me!”

This statement made both threw back their heads in laughter. This why Therese loves hanging out with Gen, she always manages to make her laugh no matter how down her mood is. After several beers and drunken stories that Gen shares with her. Therese noticed that her friend was staring out at the window.

“What are you staring at?”

“That little girl on the other street is frantically waving at us! Look!” Gen said while waving back to the window.

Therese looked outside the window but her sight was already a little blurry because of alcohol.

“Where? I can’t see.” she said.

“There! Wave back!” Gen took her hand to raise it up and waved it back and forth.

“Oh look, they’re coming this way” Gen added.

Therese was still squinting at the window when the face of Rindy and Carol slowly appears in front of her. Rindy, who’s wearing a black autumn overcoat is still waving and saying something to Therese. She looked at Carol and saw her say something too but it is a little noisy inside the bar so Therese can’t make out what they’re saying.

“Therese, they want you to go outside.” Gen told her.

She looked at Gen and said “But I can’t”

“Oh god, is this Carol and Rindy?” Gen exclaimed “Holy shit! She is one hot momma! No wonder you’re like a school girl who’s just got her heart broken by her first lo---”  

Therese immediately covered Gen’s mouth.

“They might hear you! I’ll go outside, go after me within three minutes, rescue me!” she said while stealing glances at Carol who’s smiling on the other side of the window. Therese then made a gesture that she’ll go outside to talk to them. With her wobbly knees she walked towards the exit. Outside she was immediately welcomed by Rindy.

Therese knelt down in front of Rindy and hugged the child.

“Therese! I miss you!” Rindy said.

“Oh I miss you too Little Missy!”

“Mommy said that I might not see you anymore… Good thing she saw you while we were walking!” Therese then removed her arms around Rindy and looked at Carol who’s just standing at the side.

“Yes. Thank god for that.” she said with raised eyebrows looking directly at Carol. Even with blurry vision, Therese can see the older blonde blushed. She then stood up.

“Mommy, why are you not greeting Therese?” Rindy asked her mother while tugging her hand.

“Hello Therese” Carol said to Therese with a smile.

“Hi” Therese said as cold and as flat as she can.

“So, are you out with your friend?” the blonde asked.

“Yes” hear voice breaks “Yes, I’m out with Gen, she’s my—“ she was supposed to tell that Gen was her boss but before Therese can finish her sentence Gen who suddenly appeared cut her off.

“--- Hi, I’m Gen. Therese’s girlfriend.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooohhhh drama. 
> 
> Sorry it took me so long to update and it was a lame one. A little longer than usual to compensate for the wait. Don't worry, next chapter will be up soon! ;)


	11. First Aid

“--- Hi, I’m Gen. Therese’s girlfriend”

Gen then put her arms around my shoulders. I was tongue tied and flabbergasted. I know each one of us has a moment in our lives, a moment when we make regrets. I immediately regret the moment that I told Gen to come and rescue me for all she did was drag me down even further in this beautiful mess that I am in. My mind was at its peak it overflows until it reaches my cheek. The crimson that glowed upon my face makes me want to run away as far as I can. I know that the colour spreads to my ears and I know that it was very evident even in a starless autumn night.

“Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends babe?” Gen said before planting a prolonged kiss on my cheek.

I looked at Gen with my mouth literally wide open while she just looked at me with a big smile on her face.

“Hello, this one here is Rindy” I saw Carol extends her hand to Gen “And I’m Carol Aird”

“I’ve heard so much about you” Carol quickly added. It was a lie, I’ve never mentioned Gen to her before.

“That’s swell.” Gen replied as she takes the hand of Carol and shake it  “I wish that I can tell the same about you but all I know is that you hired my girlfriend as a nanny” she quickly added then she hand me my bag that contains my camera.

“I see---” Carol smiled.

“Well. It’s finally nice to know the person who Therese spent last night with.” Gen said with her arm still draped on my shoulders.

Carol chuckled then she took a deep breath before continuing “Anyways, I’m rather surprised to know that Therese has a girlfriend---“

“---Surprised? Why? Are you one of those homophobic---” Gen said cutting the blonde off. 

“God no!” Carol exclaimed.

 “So why were you surprised then?” Gen asked raising her eyebrow.

“It’s just that she didn’t mention the part that she’s actually dating someone”

“I thought that you’ve heard so much about me?” Gen asked with raised eyebrows.

There was a second or two of silence between the four of us. Just a minute ago I gained a girlfriend and apparently it was a crazy jealous type one. I saw Carol raise one of her eyebrows a little but before she can answer Rindy was already tugging Gen’s arm.

“Can I speak to Therese?” Rindy asked her.

“Yeah, sure sweetheart“ Gen replied while stepping aside for Rindy.

“Therese, we’re going to ice skate right now. Do you want to join us?” Rindy asked me. I was about to answer but Carol cut me off.

“Snowflake, I’m afraid Therese is a little busy right now. She’s out with her _girlfriend_ “ she said.

“We can invite her too!” she told her Mom, but before Carol can protest Rindy was already talking to Genevieve “Excuse me girlfriend, would you like to go ice skating with us? It would be fun”

Gen chuckled and knelt down in front of Rindy.

“Aren’t you a cute little girl? No wonder Therese likes to talk about you…” Gen said. The little girl blushed.

“Really? What did she say about me??”

“Well. She told me you have this fairy friend that I just can’t seem to recall the name…”

Thankful that Gen’s arm was removed from my shoulders I took about three steps away from them, just to give myself some air. I was listening to the conversation of Gen and Rindy about Sugar Plum Fairy when I noticed Carol was already standing close beside me, our shoulders almost touching. Her eyes were glued to Rindy as I watch her lit a cigarette.

“This may take a while…" she whispered as she leans in close to me.

Fully aware of the heat radiating from her body, I looked up to her and uttered “What?”

She nods her head towards the direction of Rindy and Gen and said “Rindy’s explaining the different powers of Sugar Plum Fairy. This will take a while”

“Oh.” She took another drag of her cigarette seeing her smoke makes me crave for one too.

We spent the next seconds in silence while listening to the conversation between Rindy and Gen.

“Did she know that you were sick last night?” she suddenly asked.

“Gen? Yeah, I have mentioned it to her”

She nodded as a response.

A beat later she asked “Then why are you out tonight?”

“Why?” I asked her back then I took one cigarette from my pack. I was about to light the cigarette placed between my lips when she spoke again.

“Are you well enough to smoke?”

Instead of answering her, I removed the cigarette from my lips and held it on my finger. Unlit. 

Seconds later she spoke again.

 “How much did you already drink?” she said before she took another drag of her cigarette without taking a single glance at me.

“Just a couple of beers and some shots” I giggled, I don’t know why but I somehow found that moment a little funny.

“Are you drunk?” this time she looked at me.

I was getting a little irritated with her at this moment so I looked directly into her eyes without blinking as I place my cigarette on my lips and light it. Then I took a long drag of it and exhaled the smoke away. She squinted her eyes still staring at me but seconds later she averted her gaze away. It was the first time that she was the one who winced and I took it as a victory.

“Can’t bare to see your _nanny_ drunk huh?” I said with a mocking tone.

She scoffed.

“I already saw you drunk. I’m just wondering if I should get used to seeing you like this” she then flashed a mischievous smile at me. She threw her cigarette butt away and approached Rindy and Gen.

“Alright Snowflake, let’s get going” Carol said to Rindy as Gen was standing up from her position.

“So are you coming girlfriend?” Rindy asked Gen.

“I don’t know how to skate so I’ll pass kiddo”

Rindy’s face immediately turned gloomy.

“So it means Therese won’t be joining us because girlfriend can’t go?” she was asking Carol.

I threw my cigarette away and answered her.

“I’m sorry Little Missy. But I’m afraid I have to stay here with Gen.”

Carol was about to say something when Gen cut her off.

“Oh no. Therese will definitely come with you girls” she said as she was pushing me towards them.

“Yay!” exclaimed Rindy. I looked at Gen with shock written all over my face. I was trying to mentally tell her that I don’t want to go. But she was just looking at me with naughty and playful smile written on her face.

“Excuse us for just a second” I told Carol and Rindy as I pull Genevieve away from them. When I was sure that the distance was already sufficient I faced Gen.

“What are you doing???” I was shout-whispering to her.

“What?” she snickered.

“I have a perfect excuse not to come with them cause we were supposed to be on a date remember _Baaabe_?”

“Therese look…” she pointed towards Carol and Rindy who were anxiously waiting for our return.

“Stop pointing at them!” I swat her arm to put it down

“Can’t you see how adorable Rindy is? How can you say no to that Cutie Patootie girl!”

Then she merrily walked back towards Rindy and Carol, I followed her back then I noticed that she was cheerfully bouncing with delight.

“Yes, Therese will go ice skating with you girls.” Gen declared to the two blondes in front of her.

“Oh what a happy day!” Rindy exclaimed

“Oh please don’t let us ruin your date night.” Carol said.

“Pfft. It is alright with me.” Gen replied as she was picking Rindy up “and besides, I have to be up very early tomorrow.”

“Very well then. Let’s go catch a cab.” Carol said while she was looking directly at me.

Gen stayed with us while waiting for a cab, when it arrived Carol was the first one to board the car followed by Rindy. When it was my turn, Gen quickly pulled me away from the car and gave me a lingering kiss on my lips. I looked at her with rage.

“You’ll thank me later” She just whispered and ushered me towards the cab.

\---

I spent the whole taxi ride listening to Rindy’s story about the zoo that they have visited earlier that day. As the child was recounting their different adventures, I regularly stole glances at Carol who was just quietly looking out of the car’s window.

When we finally arrived at the rink Carol directly went to the booth to rent some skates for the three of us, while Rindy settled on a nearby bench to watch the people. I, on the other hand took the opportunity to take snaps of the people skating on ice. When Carol came back, the two of them hurriedly put their skates on. I told them that I’ll be following them into the rink after I satisfy myself with the pictures. After some moments of photographing strangers having fun on the ice, I suddenly felt lonely inside that I started to look for my two blondes. When I spotted them I was stopped on my tracks because of the warm sight in front me. Carol and Rindy was all smiles skating hand in hand. It was a perfect photo opportunity, so I snapped lots of photos without them noticing me. When I felt that I have captured enough, I decided to go into the rink.

With my dangling around my neck and shaky legs, I step onto the ice. I don’t know if it is because of the lack of practice or the presence of alcohol in my system cause seconds later I fell down flat on my butt. I heard Rindy giggle with delight. Then Carol glided towards me laughing her heart out. She grabbed my hands to help me get back on my feet.

“Hello” I told her.

“Hello stranger” Carol looked at me with the brightest smile that she had ever flashed before me that my heart sunk. With Rindy holding the other, she extends her free hand for me to take.  When I touched her hand, I noticed that it was cold af. I smiled at. Perplexed she smiled back and asked me why.

“A cold hand means a warm heart” I just said.

She chuckled.

“Are you alright?” she asked. I nodded as a response.

“You sure?”

“Yes” flashing her with a reassuring smile.

“Alright then” With our hands intertwined we glided together with Rindy.

The air was cold, the ice was cold. At first it's hard to move, but one glide, step, glide, step, I was skating. Although With the cold wind in my face, blowing my hair, being with these two blondes made me feel very warm inside. The three of us played with each other on the rink; laughing at each other, falling on our butts, holding hands. Maybe we use the term “falling in love” because we don’t ever choose to fall in love. It just happens. It was a magical night for the three of us that we only noticed that it was getting late when the PA system announced that the rink will be closed in 30 minutes.

We hailed a cab going to their apartment. With Rindy asleep on my arms, Carol and I rode the elevator in silence. Our shoulders and arms were pressed together while we were stealing glances at each other and smiling like school girls. Inside their apartment, I immediately went straight to Rindy’s room to put the child to bed leaving Carol rummaging something in the kitchen.

“Therese?” Rindy called me when I was removing her boots.

I hummed as a reply.

“Will you read me a story?” she asked fighting off sleep by trying to keep her eyes opened.

“Sure. What story do you want?”

“Anything. I just want to hear your voice”

My heart melted

“Can we play again tomorrow?” she asked.

“Of course”

I chose Cinderella to read to her. It is not that long after Rindy succumbed to slumber, before leaving her room I hugged her very tight and kissed her forehead.

In the living room, I saw Carol sitting on the sofa.

“I should go” I told her.

She didn’t answer me. Then I noticed that she has an ice pack on her knee and a first aid kit placed in front of her.

“Carol, are you hurt?” I said pointing to her knee which was bleeding and was bruised. It was a dumb question, of course she was hurt, she was bleeding for chrissake!

“Oh this? It’s nothing, just a bruise”

I rushed towards her and examined her exposed knee.

“Here, let me help”

I sat on the floor in front of her so that I can easily clean and bandage her wounds.

“You don’t have to. Really, I’m okay” she protested as she tried to hold my hand to stop me.

I swatted her hands away.

“Don’t be stubborn now” I told her.

We spent the next minutes in silence; I was busy cleaning her cut and she was just looking at me intently.

I was putting some ointment on her cut when she winced in pain.

“Oops. Sorry.” I told her.

“You should have told me” she suddenly said.

“Told you what?” I asked her.

“That you were dating someone”

“Why? Does it matter?”

She didn’t answer me.

 

I was gently blowing the cut to soothe the pain, when I suddenly feel her hands cupping my cheeks.

“No” she told me.

“What?”  I looked up to her and saw that her face was getting closer to mine.

“It doesn’t matter”

The next thing i knew her lips came crashing into mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank my good old friends "Johnnie W." and "J. Daniels" for the majestic juices that you've given me. I couldn't have done it without you!


	12. The Leap

I can feel that my pulse was abnormally quick and neurons were flying around faster than ever. I was nervous, anxious and excited that I noticed that my palms got sweaty. It started as gentle and as subtle as it can be, a light kiss upon my soul; a Euphoric kiss. It wasn't that grand, there were no wind blowing us around or doves flying above nor fireworks exploding. It was simple. Just her lips on mine, soft and still. But I knew, right then and there that this is right, this is what I want. And she is it.

 _Just how much tongue should I use? Will it be too wet? Will it be good enough?_ These were the questions that were racing through my mind. And just when the shit was about to heat up I noticed that our noses were awkwardly pressed into each other, I tried to supress a smile from my lips that were still busy with her but failed miserably. I let out a little giggle. She slowly withdrew her lips followed by her hands that were cupping both my cheeks and she uttered,

“I --- I’m sorry. I don’t know what—what to say.”

“Carol—“ I said softly almost a whisper, my lips immediately empty without hers pressed into mine.

“I’m terribly embarrassed” she continued while averting her gaze from mine.

She then stood up from the couch and walked towards the glass door of the balcony. She didn’t went outside, she was just standing with her back facing me, staring into the darkness of another starless night.

Still seated by the sofa, I was frozen, I didn’t know what to do. Then I remembered something Sister Alicia used to tell me

_“If you truly want something, let your heart chase after it”_

With that, I slowly approached Carol who was still staring into the dark void outside, I stopped when there was only inches between us. I slowly caressed her arm, she flinched a little because of our sudden contact.

“Carol---” I said.

"Miles away," she said with her back still facing me," We're miles away, Therese."

“No we’re not. We can work this out Carol.” I firmly said then I wrapped my arms around her waist with my face pressed against her back. She then caressed my arms very softly. We were quiet for quite sometime, both of us inhaling and savouring each other’s company.

“But you’re with Gen---” she then said in almost a whisper, breaking our silence.

 _Oh Gen, you big pain in the ass!_ I rolled my eyes and inhaled deeply.

“Don’t think about Gen—she will be okay”, I continued, “I want you!”

“I’m still _technically_ with Sarah”

“I don’t care!”

“But it doesn't make sense Therese”

“It's the only thing that does makes sense!” I let go of my embrace and walked in front of Carol.

“Carol, I love you” I told her while looking directly at her poker face. I don’t know if she heard me or if she understands that I just declared my love to her but her face is as blank as my finals examination booklet.

“I love you” I repeated. Still no reply nor expression, she was just staring blankly like she was stupefied.

I was feeling defeated with the thought that she will never reciprocate my declaration of love, I reached out for her hands and pressed it into my lips. As I turn around to retreat back to gather my things, I felt her hand clutching my wrist when I heard her say

“Don’t you know I love you?”

I looked back at her and a smile broke from her face. My blood shimmered and my heart leaped.  The time stood still as her eyes looked deeply into mine. Then she pulled me back towards her and immediately pressed her lips into mine. Suddenly the feeling of fireworks were erupting on my lips. I can feel the electricity pulsing through her fingertips tracing down my hips to the curves of my spine. I let out a little moan letting my mouth open a little wider, she must have read it as invitation to go a little deeper for next thing I knew our tongues are already in a sword fight.

Without breaking our kiss, I slowly directed her back towards the sofa. When the back of her knee hit the edge, I pushed her down and I immediately saddled her; my legs were spread apart in between are hers.

“Is this okay?” I asked her with my voice hoarse and breathless but she didn’t answer, instead she hungrily devoured my lips and then my neck. With my eyes closed I'd let my hands roam across her skin, reading all her goosebumps like braille. I heard her gave out a moan when I let my hand fondle and grab a handful of those succulent breast. Carol on the other hand, was busy kissing and biting me all over my lips, ears and neck while her hands were busy playing underneath my bra.

Still saddled on her I broke our kiss to remove my shirt then it was followed by my bra. Exposed for the first time in front of her, I can see that her eyes were shining and burning with desire

“You are perfect” she said with her breath coming out harshly and my heart was fluttering. She again hungrily devoured my lips then her kisses slowly makes its way down to my neck then to my chest and finally to my breast.

“Carol---“ I managed to utter as I threw my head back to enjoy more of the sensation that she was giving  me, my hand clenching her golden hair.

She was slowly teasing my nipples by making swirly shapes and movement with her tongue on it when the doorbell suddenly cries. Carol, giving no attention to the sound, continues to feed on my breast.

“Ca--Carol, some--someone’s at the doo---door” I said trying to suppress the moans to make a full statement.

Carol then stopped and looked at me.

“Don’t mind it” she said before taking my lips. I tried to take it off my mind but the doorbell keeps on ringing continuously. I broke off our kiss.

“Rindy might wake up because of the noise” I said as I unsaddled her and started looking for my shirt that I threw somewhere on the floor.

I heard her make an audible and exaggerated grunt. The doorbell keeps ringing.

“Who the hell is ringing my doorbell at this godly hour?” Carol annoyed.

At this point, I was already wearing my shirt back on and wondering who was ringing the doorbell.

Carol rolled her eyes and approached me to give me another soft kiss on my lips.

“To be continued”, she said before giving me a playful wink. I smiled at her and she smiled back. Then I watched her as she glides effortlessly from the living room to the foyer stopping briefly in front of the mirror to check if she was presentable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just filler chapter. A little smutty for my taste. But hey, you guys asked for more, who am I to defy you? Hope I have awakened, even a little bit, something within you. ;)


	13. Green Fairy

Carol was greeted by the morning singing of birds too soon. Through the window the cold wind was visiting and the first ray of sunshine was slowly trying to take a peep out of the clouds. She shivered, wishing that the night wasn't so limiting. She wished to return to her peaceful dreams but it became difficult because of her throbbing temples and the sour tastes of liquor and cigarettes that was still coated on her tongue. She raised her hand to her head to slightly massage her aching temples when she noticed that there was a stinging pain on her left shoulder. With her free hand she tried to touch the source of her discomfort but she hissed in pain when her finger landed on her aching skin. Weirded out she decided to check herself on the mirror but before she can stir from her bed she was stopped by foreign movements that were not made by her. Without looking, she let her hand slowly and carefully reach out on her side hoping that it was empty. But to her dismay, her hand landed on a soft skin that feels like an arm. As if she was burnt by the contact she quickly withdrew her hand and she swiftly looked at the body beside her. Her stomach dropped and her breath shallowed because of the sight of a brunette sleeping on her stomach with only the bed sheets covering her buttocks and her face was turned away from the blonde. She quickly looked under her own sheets to check if she was also naked, and indeed she was. Carol can feel her heartbeats grew quicker, she suddenly found it hard to breath. She slipped out of the bed very carefully not to disturb the sleeping brunette beside her. She almost screamed in pain when she stepped out of the bed, apparently she twisted her right ankle last night.  With her throbbing temples she wore her robe over her naked body.

“Oh dear god…” she whispered when she was limping her way through the door of the bedroom and noticed that there were discarded clothes scattered on the floor of her bedroom.

When she got out of the room she went to Rindy’s room and found the child still sleeping soundly. She then quickly went to the bathroom at the end of the hallway trying to make little noise as possible. Inside, she relieved herself and splashed her face with some cold water. Standing infront of the mirror she investigates the cause of the stinging pain on her shoulder. It was just what she was dreading to see, it was a bite mark. And apparently it was from a crazy night that she and the sleeping “unknown brunette” shared last night. Staring in front of the mirror, she began to replay the things that happened last night. All she can remember was that she was in a steamy make out session with Therese when Abby suddenly barged in with a different kind of booze then they were drinking shots after shots in the apartment. Then it was all a big blur.

_Oh my god. Did I sleep with Abby??? Or was it Therese???? For fuck’s sake Carol, you’re already 37 years old, stop acting like a teenager!_

Feeling defeated she went outside the bathroom. Determined to find out who was the person sleeping on her bed, she found herself standing in front of her bedroom door. As she was about to enter her bedroom, she suddenly heard a noise from the kitchen. Hearing her heart beats in her ear she slowly made her way towards the kitchen.

“Hello?” Carol quietly called out.

“Good morning Mrs. Aird” Suddenly a nerdy teenager of about 15 or 16 years of age emerged from the kitchen making Carol jump from her skin.

“Jesus Christ. Florence, you scared me…”

“I’m sorry Mrs. Aird” Florence said while smiling revealing her braces blinding Carol “I was just trying to make coffee for you. Would you like some?”

“You’re an angel. Yes please.” Still limping Carol then took a seat on one of the bar stools by the kitchen counter while Florence was fixing her coffee.

“Did you have fun last night Mrs. Aird?” Florence asked still busy with the coffee.

“Huh? I’m sorry, I’m totally out of it this morning. Will you repeat that again?” Carol said massaging her still throbbing temples.

“I said if you girls had fun with your night out last night…”

“What do you mean ‘night out’?”

“You told me that you have a night out with your friend, that’s why you called me to baby-sit Rindy while you guys were gone…”

“I see…” Carol still trying to remember continues “Around what time did I call you? And what time did you arrive here again Florence?”

Weirded out Florence just shrugged and told the story Carol

 

 

> “Well Mrs. Aird, it was around 11:30 in the evening when you called me last night. To be honest I was having second thoughts on picking my phone up. If you can remember I told you the last time that I baby sit for you that it was my final duty ever, cause I want to focus on my studies and all. But you were really determined last night Mrs. Aird. I only picked it up after your 7th consecutive call. Don’t act so surprised Mrs. Aird, yes, you did that. Seven consecutive calls in the middle of the night. I picked it up thinking that it was an emergency but to my surprise you were just _hammered_. You told me that you _NEED_ me to baby-sit Rindy for the night cause you and your friend will go out and party. I hesitated ‘cause it was late and my Mom will definitely forbid me to go to our next door drunk neighbour. You must have sensed my hesitation and offered me 400 bucks for the night---“

“400 dollars???” Carol cut her off.

“Yes Mrs. Aird. 400 dollars. Is there anything wrong with it?” Florence said with a raised eyebrow.

Embarrassed by her reaction, Carol just shook her head.

“Very well then.” Florence continued “The next thing I knew I snuck out of our apartment and was knocking on your front door. The moment that I entered the door the odour of the liquor that you were drinking immediately made me feel dizzy…” Florence stopped for a while when she was giving Carol her coffee.

“Well, go on” Carol said.

“Well that was it. After a few minutes when I arrived, you girls went out. You gave me the 400 bucks and told me not to wait for you as usual, so I slept inside Rindy’s room”

“I see…” Carol staring into the emptiness sipped her coffee. The bitter taste of caffeine was slowly flowing through her veins waking her whole body. “How many did you say we were?”

“Just you and your friend Abby.”

“Really?! No Therese?”

“Theresa? Who?”

“Never mind.”

Carol pondered on the story, if there was no Therese in Florence’s tale then she is positive that she just slept with Abby last night. Carol and Abby worked very hard to rebuild their friendship after their short lived affair and all those hard works were thrown away by just one drunken night. Saddened by the thought, Carol continues to stare in the air in front of her as she sips her coffee. Thinking off all the possible scenarios that she and Abby will have to face once the latter wakes from her slumber. With Florence clearing her throat to get her attention, Carol snapped back to reality.

“Well Mrs. Aird, I have to go now.”

“Of course. Come, let me see you by the door.”

Then Florence walked quietly towards the door while Carol limped her way through. Carol once again said her thanks to Florence before closing the door.

As she was limping her way back towards the kitchen, she heard the doorbell buzz. Thinking that it was Florence who just forgot something, she opened the door. To her surprise it was Abby

“Good morning nit---“ Abby said.

“Oh Abby, we didn’t sleep together last night! I’m so happy!” Carol hugged her friend.

“Yaaaay?” was the sarcastic reply of Abby.

In the kitchen, Carol served her friend with coffee.

“Why the hell did you think that we slept together last night?” Abby asked.

Carol then told her about the brunette sleeping on her bed.

Wide eyed Abby then suddenly ran towards Carol’s door and slowly entered the room to have a peek.

 “Well, who is she??” Carol eagerly asked Abby when she came back from the room.

“I don’t know, you tell me!”

“What??! I don’t know who she is! I can’t see her face a while ago and I panicked.” God knows how much she wanted it to be Therese.

“Holy shit Carol!”

“I can’t remember anything from last night…” Carol explained.

“Wow Carol! You horny Nitwit!”

“I was hoping that you can fill me in with details of last night.”

“What was the last thing that you can remember?”

“Well, I was making out with Therese when you arrived---“ it slipped out of her mouth

“I knew it! Ha! I was just waiting for you to tell me about it the whole night but you didn’t!”

Carol can feel her cheeks blush.

“Well, please tell me what you know!” Carol said.

 

 

> “Alright then. So, I was just hanging around in my apartment last night I think it was around 9, when I saw my stash of absinthe and tequila. Well, I’ve always wanted to try the green fairy with you so I decided to bring it over here. So when you opened the door, I immediately knew that something was up.
> 
> “What’s up?” I asked you.
> 
> “What’s _up_? What’s up with you nitwit? It is already late” you told me. Then I just raised my hands and in it are the bottles of absinthe and tequila. I pushed pass you and saw Belivet standing in the middle of the living room – bra less. You don’t need to have a trained eye to notice those erect nipples standing—OUCH! Hey! Fine fine! Anyways, I looked for a shot glass in the kitchen and when I came back to the living room, you two gals are like school girl gushing over at each other. I was actually offended that you thought that I was dumb enough not to notice that you guys were eye-fucking all night long! It was an “eye-fuck fest” alright! Hahaha. Back to the story, so we were drinking shots after shots after shots. You and Belivet were so drunk last night that I know that the eye fucking will not be enough for the two of you. But after a while, Belivet told us that she needed to go because she needs to report to her office in the morning. Ofcourse, we told her that she should stay but she insisted and told us that her friend Dannie was going to pick her up here. So while waiting for her friend, we drank some more shots and when he arrived Belivet hugged me and told me her goodbyes. But for you, my good friend, she let her tongue do the talking. I mean, you should have seen your drunken make out session with Belivet. Dannie and I were stood frozen with our eyes wide---OUCH! Hey, hit me once more I’m ending this story. Good! Anyway, so after Belivet left, you just sulked on the corner of the room with your phone. Trying not to let the party come to an end, I decided that we have to go out and go to this new bar that I know of. So, we called Florence and thank god after how many call she picked up. You know what happened in that part of the story. Well, 30 minutes after we left your apartment, you tripped on the sidewalk. I figured you were too hammered to go anywhere and I think that you sprained your ankle, so we just went back here. Does it hurt? Yes? Well press some ice on it. Anyways, with your key, I opened the door and left you here on your sofa then I went home. I figured that you will have a major hang over this morning that’s why I decided to swing by before going to the office.”

 

“Well that didn’t answer anything” Carol said sighing.

“Who do you think she is?” Abby asked.

“Do you think it is Therese?” Carol replied.

“Is it Therese? Her hair is a little light for Therese...”

“I don’t know. I hope that it is Therese” Carol continued “I just can’t believe that I can’t remember our first night together”

“Well, I’m pretty sure that it was mind blowing, you brain is pretty fucked up now!” Abby said before laughing her heart out. Carol covered her blushing face with her hands. Then Abby abruptly took Carol’s hand into hers.

“Look! Where did you get this?” Abby was pointing to the diamond ring on Carol’s ring finger of her right hand.

Noticing it the first time, Carol was out of words. The morning just got more and more “interesting”.

Carol was about to say something when her cellphone suddenly rings. She can’t remember where her phone was, so she and Abby just followed the sound. They found the phone inside Carol’s purse that was placed on the consul table by the foyer. Carol, without looking at the caller id, accepted the call.

“Hello?” Carol said.

“Hi good morning Carol…” the shy voice of Therese on the other line made Carol’s heart sink.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bear with me dear readers. I can see the light at the end of this very dark tunnel. Next chapter will be posted ASAP! (And by asap I mean, in 2 to 3 days) Huehuehuehue. :)


	14. Spontaneity

After hours of deliberation while tossing and turning on my own bed, finally, I found myself standing in front of the door of my loved one. Determined to accomplish the goal that pushed me to go there, I rang the doorbell, once-twice-thrice. But no one answered. It was so late in the night that it made sense that she was already sleeping. I decided that I might as well retreat back to my own abode and push through with my original plan which will take place tomorrow over dinner – just the two of us. This was the price that I have to pay for being spontaneous aside from the ridiculous result of my salon visit earlier. I decided to try to ring the doorbell once more before I make my way towards the elevator. I was about to take a step away when I heard some shuffling behind the door. Seconds later, the door opened revealing the cause of my sleepless nights, making my heart skip a beat. I love the way how she makes my heart go wild after all this time even just by standing in front of me.

“You came back!” she told me.

“Hi” I told her.

“Hiya back stranger” she replied smiling then she suddenly pulled me towards her enveloping me to a deep kiss. I wish that I can describe that tingling sensation she gives me whenever she pulls my face closer to her before we share a very sweet kiss but no word can describe it.

“Carol, wait. We have to talk” I told her breathless.

“Talk about what darling? I miss you” she said before shrouding me with an intimate embrace and sensual kiss.  

Her mouth taste was so bitter that it tasted like an open bar but I didn’t mind it. She left me breathless, left me woozy and left me weak but I needed to stay strong to accomplish my mission. With all the strength that I can muster I withdrew from our passionate kiss.

“Carol, please this is important” I said as I was gasping for breath.

“Alright then, let’s talk…” she said smiling then she leaned in towards my ear

“We can talk in my room, on my bed. You are mine to feast on tonight baby” she whispered making my insides quiver.

She grabbed my hand and led me towards her bedroom then I noticed that she was limping. I asked her about her foot but she didn’t answer me. When we were inside her bedroom, I asked her again about her foot but instead of answering me she pushed me hard towards the bed. I was actually shocked and stunned by her dominance that all I did was swallow. She slowly crawled on top of me as I lay on her bed, she saddled my legs and she kneeled having my legs between her own. She stare down into my  face and slowly began to undress. Piece by piece her clothing drops to the floor. My eyes drop down, lingering on her breasts. Her skin soft and smooth, shimmers golden in the soft light. She turned slowly, allowing the every curve of her body to be illuminated - the arch of her back, the contour of her hip and the arc of her buttocks. My eyes trace down her thighs, which were already spread and backed up. Her sweet opening that promises so much pleasure was still away from my lips, my tongue and my desire. Cupping her own breasts with her hands she was playing with her own nipples. From her erect nipples, my eyes reach hers, then time and space paused for us for a second, before she leaned in, her breath on my ear and she whispered,

“You can talk now honey”

I can feel her passion burns bright that her fire catches me, igniting my soul. Violently aroused by lust, her flames engulfing me consumed my mind that I pulled her head and kissed her aggressively. Only a fool will chose words over the poetry of her tongue.

Without breaking our kiss, I stripped naked until I am bare. Soul reached, spirit unveiled, fears are gone and confidence prevailed. My legs were stretched out, her palms wrapped around my hips. My body clung to hers. Her breathing was calm. I can feel her pace as our bodies embrace, paralyzed by pleasure, encapsulated forever. My skin illuminated with her touch, my body quaking from the rush. My aching loins was eager with lust. I started sucking on her lips like they were my own. I pulled her into my hips, sending shivers up and down her backbone. I could feel her body shiver, as she rubbed it against my pelvic bone. I dipped my fingers in her honey sweet sap, steering her emotions with sensations of passion. She was wet as a puddle that I want to play in forever. I looked deep into her eyes as she moaned and groaned and I swiftly maneuvered the position of our body. Her legs were spread, wide open and exposed just for me, I can see that her tender folds aroused and swollen with desire, I devoured her with a mouthful.  I played with her with my tongue, dipping and tasting every inch of her and the moment just kept getting better, her body language was making a point and was leading me on. Her hips were uncontrollable with her rocking and her moans and groans were louder. With ravenous passion, I consumed her selfishly. Then I felt her grabbing my hair which was the sign that she was close. I continue on with my feast dipping my fingers further down the hole. Moments later her body stiffens with quivers, her grasps on my hair tighter, she shouted something that I didn’t understand. As she recovers from her orgasm, I slowly climbed back up and pressed a soft kisses on her lips.

“That was memorable!” she said with her eyes closed panting trying to catch her breath.

I gave out a hearty laugh and kissed her forehead. I left the bed to look for pants on the floor. When I found it I immediately retrieved a small box from the pocket then I swiftly came back to bed. I lay back to my place facing Carol still with her eyes closed then I started with my plan.

“Carol” I opened the box in front of her revealing a diamond ring

“Will you marry me?” I asked her.

A beat. Then she nods. A tear finds its way down my cheek, as I slip the ring to her ring finger. I smiled and hid my face in a pillow, it’s been a somewhat long week but I know that we can work it out together.

“I love you” I told her and she smiled.

“I love you Ter---“ She must be so exhausted that she dozed off in the middle of her sentence. I smiled and kissed her one last time. Her lips so tender and beautiful. I am truly in love with her. I know you hear this a lot but I am pretty sure that I could never love another woman as much as I love her. I closed my eyes with my heartbeats still racing.


	15. Past Present Future

Seeing Carol’s face slowly turn white as if she saw a ghost made me rush to her side. Concerned about her state I put a hand on her shoulder and whispered,

” _Are you okay?”_

“Therese!” Carol almost shouted the name with her mobile still pressed on her ear.

“ _Holy shit! If that’s Therese, then who the fuck is on your bed right now?”_ I started to pace back and forth with my hands on my waist and my eyes on the floor. Still shout-whispering I continued _“And HOW THE FUCK CAN’T YOU REMEMBER ANYTHING FROM LAST NIGHT? Ha! I guess you finally found your poison Carol. Why don’t you call your Green Fairy Godmother and wish your memories back. Hahaha_ ” Not hearing any response from her made me stop on my tracks “ _Carol? Are you listening?”_

And of course, who am I kidding? The Nitwit is not listening to me but instead she was now sitting on the sofa and giggling like a school girl while talking to her mobile using her ‘flirty voice’.

Please don’t misread me, I truly am happy for my friend. Truly. Seeing her eyes light up whenever they land on Therese’s is good enough sign for me that she is in a fucking cloud nine. Heck, even if I merely mention the _"_ name" her face automatically blinds me. And no, I ain’t bitter. It is just that the Carol I know is not giddy nor romantic nor is love sick, unlike the Carol in front of me right now who is a middle school girl giggling and talking to her crush. The scene unfolding in front of me sends chills to my body and it makes me wanna vomit.

“Jesus Christ…” I uttered under my breath. With my rolling eyes, I made my way towards the kitchen to prepare some coffee. I was pouring some in a cup when Carol entered the premises looking like she’s starring in a Disney musical movie who’s about to sing along with the animals. I noticed that she was holding the mobile on her right hand and a camera on the other as she sits down by the kitchen counter.

“So, do you want to tell me about the phone call?” I asked her with raised eyebrows as I took a sip from my cup.

“Abby…” she softly said but I can hear the excitement in her voice “It was Therese.”

“The whole city already knows that…” I chuckled.

“She forgot her camera” she uttered with rather dreamy face staring at the camera on hand.

“She’s coming over here in about 15 minutes. She’s going to bring breakfast” she said with that blinding twinkle in her eyes and faint blush on her face.

“Oh-oh. This can’t be good”

“What? Why???” Her face was suddenly painted with concern.

“Carol, are you still drunk? Remind me to never let you near a bottle of Absinthe again”

“I don’t know what you mean Abby…” still grinning while she’s pouring some coffee for herself.

“Better snap out of it nitwit. And _FAST._ You have 15 minutes to fix your whole ‘ _sleeping beauty’_ mess”

As much as I hate seeing Carol act like a 12 year old girl it still pains me to see the twinkle in her eyes be replaced by confusion and fear.

“Oh god, I totally forgot about her! Fuck!” she said with her hands on her face.

 “Seriously Carol, you need to pucker your lips up. You’ll be needing them to break the binding curse of the sleeping princess” I said jokingly, trying to lighten up the tensed energy around us and to my relief she chuckled at my joke. She nodded several times before leaving her mobile and Therese’s camera on the counter. She then stood up walked towards her room but before she manages to cross the threshold of the kitchen she stopped.

“Come with me?” she said to me.

“You have got to be kidding me—“ I said trying to suppress my chuckles “You’re an adult! Don’t be a stupe!”

“Okay okay, I’m going” and with that she took a deep breath and marched outside the kitchen and towards her room. I drank coffee while I check my emails on my phone. And of course, Mrs. Paulson was already reminding me about my scheduled meetings for the day.

Carol’s presence in the kitchen snapped me back from my reverie. I can’t fucking read her face right now cause she was wearing her famous poker face and was staring at nowhere.

“How did it go? Is everything okay?” I asked her worried.

“Abby…I’m getting married” she uttered very softly in a monotone and emotionless voice.

“What did you say? _Speak up Child_!” I said with a rather poor English accent “I think I just heard you say that you were getting married….” I chuckled but she just remained silent still staring ahead.  

Then it struck me, I rapidly snatched her hand

“Holy shit!” I exclaimed and continued “So that explains the ring! But to whom? Surely, you can’t marry a stranger---“

Then I saw Sarah come out of the bedroom, wearing a robe and sporting a new hairdo…

“Sonofabitch!” I uttered under my breath “Well, congratulations my friend” I whispered to Carol.

“Good morning Abigail!” Sarah exclaimed, obviously she was in a good mood and high spirits. God knows how I hate that voice.

“New look?” I asked.

“My stupid hairdresser thought that I need a make-over. Do you like it?”

I raised my eyebrows and took a deep breath but before I can answer she cut me off

“No offense, but your opinion doesn’t matter. The only opinion that matters to me is Carol’s” then she encircled her arm in Carol’s neck and gave her a soft kiss in the lips.

What a fucking pain in the ass.

“And basing from last night’s events--- It is safe to say that she likes it” Sarah continued. Carol just gave her a meek smile.

“Jesus Christ and all that’s holy, help me” I whispered to myself trying my best not to snort and roll my eyes.

There was an awkward silence between the three of us, Sarah was just pouring herself some coffee, Carol was seated by the kitchen counter and then I was standing by the stove with my cup on my hand.

“Abby” Sarah said breaking the silence “Aren’t you going to congratulate us?” she continued with excitement written all over her face. Then I looked at Carol who was smiling back at Sarah.

“Oh yeah, Carol mentioned it to me” I said curtly, very aware that I still didn’t congratulate them.

Silence once again finds its way to the room.

“So, do you guys already have a date?” I asked trying to start a conversation.

“I’ve always dreamed of a winter wedding where everything is white because of the snow” Sarah immediately answered me and continued “So, I think, this January is the perfect ---“

“Sarah, baby, can we please talk about this first. Everything’s going fast honey…” Carol cut her off before she can finish her sentence.

I was internally screaming and cheering Carol, it may not be the best way to break up an engagement but who cares? There’s no _BEST or PROPER_ way to call off an engagement period.

 

“Are you changing your mind Carol?” Sarah gasped, Carol then walked towards Sarah and held her hand.

“Now, let’s not get emotional here” Carol said, I was trying to slowly creep out of the kitchen at this moment “I just like us to think things thoroughly...”

“We haven’t even pushed through our plan to visit France. Let’s plan that first before, you know, jumping into the other” Carol said trying to divert the topic, poorly. This woman is out of her wits.

“Perfect!” Sarah said with delight “We can go ---“ suddenly the doorbell starts ringing.

Abruptly Carol turned her head to look at me and gave me a worried look.

“I’ll get it!” I announced as I hurriedly walked away from the kitchen.

I opened the door thinking that Therese was behind it but to my surprise a dapper looking man sporting a tan with black hair, wearing a coat over his suit greeted me.

“Good morning Abby!” he said curtly

“Harge!” Carol suddenly appeared beside me, swinging the door fully open, revealing a couple of wrapped boxes on the floor “What in the world are you doing here??

“Good morning to you too Carol!” he said.

“Oh I’m sorry. I thought that you are in South America or somewhere. How awfully rude of me. Please, please come in” Carol said as we helped Harge with the boxes.

He immediately went straight to the living room.

“So, where’s Rindy?” he asked as he place the boxes by the sofa. I answered the question of Harge. Hearing the commotion, Sarah appeared in the living room.

“Hi Harge!” Sarah said.

“Hey Sarah, how’s it going?”

As the two of them exchanges some pleasantries Carol tugged my arm and whispered

“Okay. How the fuck am I going to survive this? I must have done something shitty in my past life to deserve this fucked up morning…”

“Your Past? Check. Your present? Check. Your future????” As I turn to look at her the doorbell rings

“I’ll get it!” I announced.

“Well… That’s your future knocking on your door right now Carol” I whispered teasingly before making my way toward the door.

“Oh please do shut up” Carol replied.

I opened the door and true enough Therese was on the other side eagerly waiting.

“Hey Belivet!” I greeted her, kissing both sides of her cheeks.

“Hi Gerhard, I brought breakfast for all of us. Is Carol around?” she shyly asked.

“Oh yes, she is around and so are the others…” I playfully said before closing the door behind us and taking the bag full of food. I can see that the excitement on her face slowly fades into puzzlement as we hear the voices of Sarah and Harge.

“Hello Therese!” Carol greeted her by also giving her a kiss on each cheeks and introduced her to the others with her hand placed on Therese’s back.

“You already met Sarah” Carol said. Therese flashed a warm and shy smile and said hi while Sarah only nodded as an acknowledgement. I am positive that I will be having an eye surgery in the future for too much eye rolling. 

“Therese, this is Harge, Rindy’s father” Carol said “And Harge, this is Therese”

Harge then shook Therese’s hand.

“A very dear friend of mine” Carol quickly added, flashing a sweet smile towards Therese.

Sarah then walked and squished her way in between Carol and Therese, and cleared her throat.

“Well, I think you two should know…” she said addressing Therese and Harge.

“Oh no Sarah, let’s not do this ---“ Carol protested.

“Carol and I are getting married!” Sarah announced.

The room was full of adults literally standing in front of each other but somehow, silence was able to shroud us with its shawl.

I saw Harge raised one of his eyebrow and looked intently at Carol before saying his warm congratulations to the couple. Therese who was just standing, I can’t see her reaction cause she was looking down at the floor, and fidgeting the strap of her bag, also congratulates the couple. Meanwhile, Sarah was the only one in the room who was still, irritatingly, grinning from ear to ear. Such an insensitive woman, she can’t fucking tell that everyone around her was uncomfortable. I, on the other hand, silently lit a cigarette, this morning was far more stressful than I expected. I just can’t imagine what’s happening within Carol’s mind who just looked as defeated as Priam of Troy.

“By the way, can I pick Rindy up from her day care later? I was hoping to spend some time with her for I was away for quite a long time. Is that alright?” he asked addressing the question to Carol.

“Ofcourse, just make sure that she’s back here before 10pm Harge” she replied.

Harge, who’s pleased with arrangement, smiled widely.

“Let Rindy stay with Harge. We’re also going to take a trip to France this weekend to plan the wedding” Sarah declared.

“This weekend?! Sarah, I have lots of work to do with the firm and lots of client to---” Carol exclaimed.

“Oh stop it. Your firm will run without you. Abby will take care of it and Rindy can stay with Harge. Come on Carol, let’s be spontaneous baby…” Sarah said, making a good argument that made me nod my head in agreement.

Another silence.

“Ahm. Excuse me, but I really need to go. I just actually need my camera” Therese shyly declared “Congratulations to the both of you”

“Are you sure?” Carol asked with her voice full of longing that even Sarah noticed it. Sarah started to shift her weight from foot to foot.

“Yes” Therese said with a weak smile not exactly meeting the gaze of Carol in front of her.

“Well, I must get going too. Mrs. Paulson will definitely kick my ass this morning for being late” I said trying to diffuse the ticking bomb in front of me.

Harge also decided that he will be leaving with us for he has a meeting to attend to.

At the elevator, Harge and I engaged in a small talk about the firm, while Therese remained silent clutching her bag and camera. In the lobby of the building, after Harge and I said our good byes, I noticed that Therese was already rushing towards the street. I called her name and ran after her. And what do you know? She didn’t stop. So, yes, I literally ran after her at the street and when I finally reached her I was panting.

“I know that it may look that I always go around chasing girls but this is the first time wherein I actually run after one” I joked still catching my breath.

I was glad that I saw her smile but her eyes was all red.

“Belivet, are you okay?” I asked her.  

She didn’t answer. She was trying so hard to hold back her tears.

“Is this about Carol?”

Still no answer.

“Is it too early for martinis?” I asked. Knowing that she will not be able to answer me, I continued.

“Alright. Let’s have breakfast. And you have to talk to me by then, alright?” I said flashing her with a big smile

I sensed that she was about to object but I cut her off immediately by clutching her arm and dragging her towards the curb to hail a cab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing else to say right now.


	16. Hey, that's no way to say goodbye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of long. So brace yourself Hon.

Our cab ride to the diner was quiet. Therese was just staring outside the window giving out a long deep sigh every now and then. I, on the other hand, was starting to feel really hungry that I can hear my stomach grumble. When we arrived at the diner, we sat on the table by the window. I ordered 2 sunny side up eggs and 2 orders of bacons with 3 pcs of pancakes – what? I was hungry because of all the stress of the morning, please don’t judge me. Therese, who still looks like that her cat just died, only ordered a black coffee.

“Aren’t you hungry?” I asked her when the waitress already made her way towards the kitchen with our order.

She didn’t answered me. She was staring to the streets outside the window.

“Belivet, are you alright? Well of course you are not but…”

It was very rare that I find myself in a situation were in I can’t think of a single thing to say, that moment was one of them. I took a deep breath thinking that maybe this will be out of my control, out of my reach to fix. While waiting for my food to arrive, I made use of the time to check my mobile for any emails and texts. And true enough, Mrs. Paulson was already looking for me.

“Oh god” I uttered before texting her to move all my meetings for this morning.

“You can leave, you know? You don’t have to stay, I can manage on my own” she said, looking at me.

“Ha!” I chuckled before hitting the send button

“You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll live” she said.

“Okay. Look Belivet” I said then I held one of her hand

“I’m here because I’m hungry, alright? Nothing more, nothing less”

She abruptly removed her hand from my gasps before flashing me a wide smile.

“Well, that’s the Belivet I know!” I said with a smile.

My food arrived with her coffee. Another silent moment was shared between the two of us, I was eating my food while she drinking her black coffee.

“So, what’s her end game?” she said breaking the silence between us.

“Huh?”

 “I really thought that she felt something for me. Cause I’m sure I did!” She continued truly trying to keep it together “I told her that I love her last night”

“Oh?” I asked, wide eyed thanks to the revelation.

“It was awfully silly of me. Expecting that she’ll say I love you back.”

“Well, what did she say?” I said before taking a mouthful of my breakfast.

“ _Don’t you know I love you?_ ” she said with a deep voice clearly mocking Carol’s.

I chuckled, almost spitting my food back to my plate.

For a moment, she’s back at staring at the window, but seconds later she said

“She’s just running around New York, looking for Nannies that she can just play with--”

“--Hey!” it was the only thing that I can say because my mouth was full of pancakes and eggs.

“—and after she’s done playing, she’ll just go back to being the romantic and perfect lover to her fiance? What a fucking slu---” she continued, truly agitated but hurt was still visible to her face.

“—Hey hey! Watch it!” I said trying to defend my friend with my mouth full of greasy goodness.

“—What is her end game Abby? Wha—what is she thinking?” then she broke down sobbing. Her hands were covering her face.

“Stop it Therese. Stop crying!” I said with a rather stern voice “I hate crying. So stop it this instance!”

Honestly, I was not expecting that she will follow me, but after uttering those words she suddenly looked up at me and tried drying her tears.

“I’m sorry. It just keeps coming…” she said referring to the tears.

I chuckled.

“Oh Belivet. Here” I gave her a napkin “Clean your face. I don’t want your snots as a topping for my pancakes” I said.

To my surprise, she gave out a hearty laugh. I just smiled at her while she was laughing so hard. But moments later, her laughs slowly becomes sobs.

“Oh no. It’s starting again” she said while laughing but still tears are falling down her eyes.

“Get a grip Belivet” I chuckled as I hand another napkin to her.

I gave her a moment to gather herself, so I decided to finish my breakfast in silence. I was just about to light a cigarette after I was done with my plate when she spoke

“It’s just so painful. Seeing her happy with someone else…” she said, almost a whisper.

“I know” I simply said as I took a drag of my cigarette.

“So, what is your story?”

“What do you mean?” I said, as I offer her my pack of cigarettes to which she declined.

“Carol and you. What is your story?” she asked.

“Ours is different from you guys” I said.

“Different? Why? Cause I’m just her toy, is that it? Cause I’m just---“ she said angrily so I cut her off.

“No!” I exclaimed “Calm down okay?”.

I took a long drag from my cigarette before continuing…

“I’ve known Carol for the longest time, I’ve known her since I was 10 years old. We may not always agree on things, we can’t change the order of things, nor make some moments better, nor alter what fate brings but I know, WE know that we have each other.”

“Did something happened between the two of you?” she shyly asked “ I mean, sexually”

I chuckled before continuing.

“We were playing strip poker – it was the biggest mistake of my life. Carol has this serious poker face going, that I can’t seem to break into. So after only 20 minutes I found myself naked in front of her. So yeah, it was the start of the fall out of our friendship. We had an affair. At first it was romantic and steamy. But eventually, it changed. It just changed. At first it was hard for me to go back to our platonic relationship, but thanked god, we worked it out. It made our relationship deeper and our bond stronger. So now, whenever we’re reminded of our short-lived affair, we cringed and laugh at it.”

I looked at her, she was eagerly waiting for me to continue.

“You were asking me question about her thoughts. But honestly, I don’t know. Even though that we’ve know each other for the longest, I can’t still read her thoughts. Carol was in a theatre group back when we were younger, and yes, basically she was the best in that group. You can never notice that she’s upset or uncomfortable in a party or in a dinner, she will just smile through the night without you noticing it unless she will be the one breaking it you. So you see, even outside the theatre, she is acting and she is doing a pretty damn good job as well. Between the two of us, she is the emotional, clingy and fragile one, but with her great acting skills many perceived that I’m the more emotional.”

I stopped to take a drag of my cigarette

“Well I guess that she was just acting with me” she quietly said.

“Ha! You should have let me finish. You’re the exception Belivet. With you, it was different. I can clearly see through her and know that she was exceptionally happy. She doesn’t have her façade up. So atleast you have that.”

“She’s getting married now. So _hurray_ for me” she said sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes and took the last drag of my cigarette before calling for our bill.

 

\----

 

“Ahm. Excuse me but I really need to go. I just actually need my camera. Congratulations to the both of you” she declared without looking anyone on the eyes. It was very obvious that she was not comfortable with the whole situation right now. Merely hours ago, we were in each other faces sharing passionate and shameful kisses, and now, she is having small talk with my “fiancé” and ex-husband. Truly, even I will feel somewhat awkward if that happens to me. 

“Are you sure?” I asked. Oh god knows how much I wanted her to stay here with me. Even if she doesn’t talk to me nor look at me, her mere presence is sufficient enough to help me go through this disaster morning.  

“Yes” then she smiled at me. It was not the usual smile that makes my heart warm, instead of a twinkle in her eyes, there was this black void that drowned me with sadness. I can feel that my chest literally constricts with pain and it was getting harder to breath. Everything around me became a bright big blur that I can only focus my vision in those eyes.

Then it hit me, there was this strong force within me that wants to shove Sarah away and pull Therese in an embrace and give her a passionate long kiss. How I long the pressure of her lips pressed into mine, the taste of her mouth, and the familiar tango that our tongues somewhat choreographed together. But I don’t know if she would like that.

Hearing Harge declared that he too will be leaving snapped me back to reality. I don’t know how long I spaced out but the moment I was transported back I saw Therese hurrying towards the kitchen.

“Sarah, why don’t you show Abby and Harge to the door. I’ll just follow you guys, I just need too…” without waiting for her answer, I marched my way towards the kitchen.

In the kitchen, I saw Therese standing by the kitchen counter her back was facing me. I slowly walked towards her without her noticing me. And when she abruptly turned around, she was surprised to see me there.

“Oh. Sorry. Abby told me my camera was in here.” Therese told me still not looking at me directly.

I stood silently.

“Congratulations, by the way. Ahm. About the engagement.” She said, still I didn’t utter a thing. I was just looking at her face, it somewhat brings me calm and peace.

“Well, I guess this is goodbye” she held out her hand for me to shake. I took it without breaking my gaze. She finally meet my eyes and suddenly I was hypnotized and was in a trance.

I don’t want her to go. I want her to stay with me, alone with Rindy. Then the three of us will cook together, maybe another meatballs spaghetti. I can see us taking a walk together, Rindy in between us, both of us holding my (our?) daughter’s hands. Then we would have to stop once in a while because Therese saw something that caught her attention that she will have to take a photo of it. Back here in the apartment, after tucking Rindy in for the night, we are going to snuggle on the sofa, by the fire, drinking wine or reading a book or just enjoying each other’s presence.

God knows how much I want that!

“Will I see you around?” I asked, hoping and pleading that she will say yes. I just need more time to fix this mess about Sarah by doing the inevitable thing to do – break up with her.

I was finally determined to leave my stable and familiar life with Sarah, I was ready to set out to a new adventure with Therese that I know for a fact that it will take a lifetime.

 _Please say yes. Please say Yes Therese._ I was begging her with my eyes.

Slowly she withdrew her hand from my grasps while shaking her head slowly. I just stood their frozen, unable to say a word, unable to feel anything while loneliness consumes my whole being.

“Good-bye Carol” she said before making her way outside the kitchen, crushing all my dreams, hopes and my will to live. I know, deep down inside, that at that moment, death just kissed me on my lips.

I remained in the kitchen motionless waiting for her to come back to me, to erase all the sadness that was enveloping me. To start a life with me. I waited. But no one came. Then I heard the door shut. She didn’t come back.

Who am I kidding? Ofcourse, she doesn’t want me. She is too young, she still got lots of things to do. Her career is just kicking off, she doesn’t want to be tied down with me – an old woman with a child. And furthermore, she has a girlfriend who’s age appropriate for her. I really am a nitwit. Thinking that you can start a life with her. Grow up Carol!

I keep telling that to myself but I know deep inside that loneliness already eats its way to my soul.

After a while, Sarah emerged to the kitchen.

“Hey. What a morning right?” she said, giving me a soft rub on my arm. Now that we’re alone, Sarah always go back to her romantic self. She tends to become a bitch whenever other people were around but somehow she is a passionate lover to me. Maybe I can work this thing out with her. Maybe if I can focus all my attention to Sarah, all the memories and my feeling for Therese will be buried deep down inside me.

“Sarah, why don’t you start booking our flight? I’ll just start packing Rindy’s things” I said before giving her a deep kiss – trying to dig inside for any feelings. I’ve been kissing these lips for about two years but it now feels like it belongs to a stranger.

When we finally withdrew from our embrace, I gave out a long sigh. And with that, I started my life as a living dead.

\---

After the breakfast with Abby, Therese found herself floating in limbo while taking random snaps around the city. Pain was her company that day and it seems like she’s stuck with it for the rest of her life. She was sulking the whole day, not bothering to answer texts and phone calls all day. And when the sun was about to set in she decided to develop some pictures to prepare for her presentation to Gen tomorrow. The first roll of film was full of random snaps within the city, she happily processed those. The next roll was from last night in the skating rink. The first batch were all the snaps of the random people skating that she took. These were all good that she decided she may add it to her presentation tomorrow. The next batch were full of pictures of Carol and Rindy having a good time in the skating rink. She will just have to send this to them through Abby. As the faces of smiling Rindy and Carol slowly appear on the photo paper under the chemicals, Therese once again felt her heart constrict with pain. After that, there was still one roll left to develop – it was the film from Mr Poopy that she took before leaving it on Rindy’s night stand. She was about to develop it when she noticed that she was out of photo chemicals, so she decided to continue it tomorrow. That night, alone on her bed, she let herself cry until she fell asleep.

The next day, it is Thursday, the day of her moot presentation to Gen. In the meeting, Therese watch her boss as she one by one meticulously examine each photo. Giving out comments from time to time like “this is nice. Great. Good. Naaah” while sorting the photos in to 3 different piles on top of her desk.

“So this one here” pointing to one pile of photos that were mostly what Therese took in the park back when Mrs. Robichiek ran after her

“These are rubbish.”

Therese winced.

“While these remaining two piles are very exceptional Therese” Gen said, clearly talking about the remaining two piles of photos on the desk.

Therese studied the two piles of her photos. The one her right was mostly the pictures that she snapped yesterday after breakfast. While the other one, were mostly the photos that she took in the skating rink.

“What makes you say so?” Therese asked nervously.

“This one here, look” Gen said pointing to the pile on Therese’s right “it has a dark feeling with it.”

“While these guys here, especially the skating rink shots…” Gen was now pointing to the other pile “… are light and carefree”

“Are they good?”

“Yes” Gen answered immediately.

“Good”

“Ahm. Good job Therese. There is certainly a noticeable improvement on your way of capturing the emotions on your camera” Gen continued “Truly, I am happy for you.”

“Thank you Gen.” Therese smiled weakly.

“So, do you want to tell me what happened 2 nights ago?” Gen said teasingly clearly referring the “date” with Carol and Rindy.

“I don’t want to talk about it” she simply dismissed it.

Gen was about to say something when her secretary came in her office reminding her about the meeting that will be happening in 5 minutes.

“I’m sorry Therese. As your boss, good job and keep it up. I’m excited to see the others in a week. Okay?” Gen when her secretary left them alone again. Therese shyly thanked her.

“As your friend, we’ll talk later. Alright?”

All that Therese can do is nod.

That evening back in her apartment, she decided to develop the remaining roll but cursed herself for forgetting about the photo chemicals. So she decided to stream some movies until she can fall asleep. Her mobile rang and saw that it was Gen, she didn’t answer. Then after sometime it beeped again a text message from Dannie asking her for to go out for some drinks, she didn’t reply. Moments later, it rang again, it was Abby and yes, she didn’t answer. Seconds later, it beeped once more, a text message from Abby asking her if she’s okay, she didn’t reply. Everybody was suddenly calling or texting her but there is only one name that Therese wanted to read from her screen and she knows that it is far from happening so she turned her phone off and focused her attention to the Tely.  She was not interested in the movie that she was watching, she just needed some noise and distraction for the pain and longing inside her.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more to go. Oh god, I'm getting emotional here. Hahaha. ;)


	17. End of the Beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is fucking long.

Some eat their pain away while others starve themselves for the same reason. I’ve heard of some people who cut their wrists to feel alive while others drink all night. But I, on the other hand, was lying in bed for two days, alone, detached from the outside world, for the same reason with the people I mentioned. It was almost noon when I decided to leave my bed, with puffy red eyes and a stuffy nose I made my way towards my living room. Seriously, I was a mess. But the state of my apartment was sadder; my sink was full of dirty dishes, I haven’t taken my trash out for almost two days, there were used tissues scattered around my apartment. I decided that instead of sulking for the rest of the day, I’ll just have to clean the apartment I call home. In this way, I’ll be doing something productive and at the same time, I’ll be able to keep myself pre-occupied to feel a thing.

While in the middle of my chore, I can’t help but look at the direction of the door every now and then, hoping that in some miracle, I will hear a knock on it and revealing her on the other side. But of course, it was just my hopeful, or rather delirious, thinking. It took me two hours to finish all my task and I was feeling satisfied as I look around my squeaky clean apartment. But that proud feeling that I have was quickly overpowered by loneliness. I miserably accepted that my life will always be full of this kind of moment wherein sadness will just suddenly eat its way to my very core.

To distract myself I decided that I’ll be developing the negatives that I got from Mr. Poppy but internally cursed myself for forgetting that I lack the photo chemicals that I needed. So, I took a quick shower and dressed myself in casual jeans and shirt. I left my turned off mobile on my night stand not bothering to check it or even turning it on. Putting my coat over my body, I’m on my way towards my favorite shop. I’ve been a patron of this antique shop ever since I bought my very first camera, Mr. Poppy, from them. Although it is several blocks away from my apartment, I always love to walk going there. The owners, Mr. and Mrs. Morrison, were the ones who taught me how to tinker with cameras and manually develop and print photos. Aside from the vintage cameras and photo chemicals, the store also sells a wide array of antique things from furniture, Chinese porcelains to clothing. On my way towards the store, I keep thinking to myself that what if I bumped into Carol. What shall I do? What shall I say? I’ve been paranoid during my walk that seeing a flash of golden blonde hair from my peripheral vision made me hold my breath and stop on my tracks. Of course, it wasn’t her, it was just a random blonde woman. She’s already on a plane to France or somewhere romantic with fucking Sarah. I sadly smiled at my stupidity as I continued marching my way towards the shop.

As I reach my destination, I saw a black luxury car parked by the curb in front of the store. Standing beside it was a bald man in a black suit with a rather heavy built, hungrily feasting on a hotdog. Before I reached the door of the store, he looked up to me and our eyes met, so I gave him an awkward smile and he gave a nod as a reply.

I’ve always loved the musky and strong smell of this old and vintage shop, so I was quite surprised when a faint but familiar scent welcomed me inside the store. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

_I am seeing visions of her everywhere and now I can even smell her perfume. I really need to get hold of myself._

I marched towards the counter, seeing that it was deserted, I rang the bell. I closed my eyes once again and savour every inhale that I made and let the scent play with my senses. Surprisingly it relaxes me. Yes, I’m weird like that. I was actually enjoying the moment when the door from behind the counter suddenly opened, interrupting my “meditation”, revealing Mr. Morrison and …

“Carol!” I exclaimed, clearly flabbergasted to see her there.

“Terry! It’s good to see you! You’re low on supply aren’t you?” the old man merrily asked me.

“I am actually. Can I get the usual please?” I said while my eyes remained glued to the magnetic grey orb that belongs to the root of all my sufferings.

“You two know each other?” Mr. Morrison addressed the question to Carol.

“Yes, we do. She’s the friend that I was talking about earlier - the one who gave me the Camera” she said without even breaking her gaze from me.

“By the way, you can pick it up in 3 days” The old man said to Carol and didn’t push for more details.

Our transaction was over in under 6 minutes - Mr Morrison gave me my much needed supply then I paid him. During that time, Carol and I were just frozen in our place, staring at each other, no one dares to break first. But it was ridiculous to stay there when my business was already done and I can feel that Mr. Morrison was feeling weird about, so I decided that I’ll be the adult between the two of us and break my gaze. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Fuck that fucking perfume!

“So, what brings you here?” I asked her.

“Getting your camera –err- Mr. Poppy fixed. I found it on Rindy’s bedside table” she said with her piercing eyes penetrating my soul.

“How is she by the way?”

“She’s staying with Harge right now. She was totally bummed out when she learned that she will not be coming to France with me and ---“ she trailed off and averted my gaze. I noticed that her ears were so red, I have never seen her this embarrassed before.

I was about to say something when suddenly the hotdog eating bald man from outside came in and went directly to Carol.

“Sorry to interrupt but we only have 45 minutes to spare or you’ll miss your flight Miss Carol” the bald man said.

“Thank you Harold. Just wait for me in the car.” Carol said.

We watched Harold as he marched outside the store.

“Who’s that guy?” I asked.

“My driver. Well technically, I borrowed him from the firm to drop me off in the airport today” she nonchalantly said.

We silently made our way outside the store - a plastic bag with several bottles of photo chemicals occupying my one hand. When we were on the streets Harold opened the back door of the car for Carol, so I decided that it was time to say goodbye.

“Well. It was nice seeing you Carol” I smiled even though my heart was breaking inside “I better start walking home. It’s getting pretty chilly. Bye!”

But before I can take my first step she stopped me by holding my free hand.

“Let me give you a ride” she said.

“Oh don’t bother, really. It’s just several blocks away. And besides, you have a flight to catch”

“Please, let me give you a ride. It’s the least that I can do” she said. I was about to protest when she suddenly snatched my photo chemicals away from my hand then climbed to the back seat of the car.

_What an immature brat!_

That thought made me smile but I tried to hide it by rolling my eyes on her as I get on the car.

Inside, I gave Harold the address of my building. In no time, the car was already moving.

“This is kidnapping you know?” I said making Carol laugh out loud. She then passed the stolen chemicals to me.

“Thank you for giving me a ride” I said.

“Don’t mention it” she said with a wink, annoyed that after all the hurt that she have done to me just her simple tease made me blushed profusely.

“So…” she continued coolly “What did you do these past two days?”

“Oh you know, the usual – developed some films and printed some photos” I answered trying to act as casual as I can.

“Really? You sure look like you lack sleep. Partied all night?”

I shook my head as an answer. I was irritated that she can fully see through me.

“Well I guess the _girlfriend_ was keeping you up all night…” she said while raising one of her eyebrows with a mischievous smile written on her face.

I took a deep breath to keep my rage settled at bay before speaking.

“No” I answered trying to act as casual as I can.

“Come on, you can tell me” she said, I can feel all my emotions raging waiting for a release, she continued “I might as well give you a tip or two in pleasuring your---“ 

“---For two nights, I lay awake on my bed, wishing you were right there next to me. Two excruciating fucking nights!” I shouted cutting her off. I saw her gasped in surprise but she didn’t try to cut me off so I continued.

“All my senses hoping against hope! Wishing I could see your face, hear your voice, smell your scent, feel your touch… taste your mouth. Ever since I met you I felt that a big void in my heart has been filled! So stop giving me some tips about pleasure because I know that I’ll never have a shot at it after this!” I suddenly confessed

“But the idea that we can only be complete with another person is pure evil! It is absurd! No one needs someone to complete them, you just need yourself to complete you!” I continued sternly,

“But I NEED you!” she shouted cutting me off.

“Then why didn’t you go after me?! Why did you let me leave that morning?!” I exclaimed with my chest heaving up and down,

“I was stupid! I tried calling you! All day that day, yesterday, last night and until a while ago! And all I got is your fucking voicemail!”

“Oh” I said guiltily when I remembered that I haven’t checked or even turned my mobile on for almost two days.

“At first I just thought that you just needed space after _that_ morning. But when I keep getting your voicemail I began to worry!” she exclaimed, it was now her turn to lose her shit “But then, I figured it out that you were clearly sending me the message that you don’t want me in your life! Well fucking message received! I’ve read it alright?!” she exasperatedly declared while throwing her hands up in the air in sheer annoyance.

Both of us sank back in our seat, calming our nerves, she was looking outside the window.

“I sometimes wish that I have a rewind button to fix all the fuck ups that I’ve done in my life” she whispered still looking out at the window.

“Wishing for a second chance so that I can fix what was broken. I’d do it in a heartbeat you know. If I have a chance to relive it once again I would control myself and try not to crack and fall apart” she gave out small sad smile. I’ve never saw her this transparent before, it made my heart ache. I stretched out my hand to touch her but I stopped midway before it lands on her skin and withdrew my hand without her noticing it. I don’t know if she would like that, I don’t know if I would like that. She let out a long sigh and finally looked at me

“It’s too late for that, isn’t it?” I asked.

She didn’t reply.

“I thought so” I whispered as she slowly nodded and faced the window again. I looked outside and saw that we were just blocks away from my apartment then I got a sniff of her perfume drowning me with emotions. Suddenly, I can’t breathe and the urge to go outside was irresistible.

“You know what” I suddenly said, I saw her abruptly turn her head to look at me “I got to get away from you. I’ll get out now.”

“No wait Therese!” she said.

“Harold, can you stop the car? I would like to get out now---” I said addressing the driver.

Carol took hold of my arms.

“Don’t touch me!” I yelled “I’m walking from here! Harold stop the car!”

The car slowed down.

“Don’t you dare Harold! Don’t you fucking dare!” Carol glared at the driver through the rear view mirror as she was still holding my arms. The car gathered speed.

“Therese, calm down! Alright?” she said as she was rubbing my hand with circular motion to relax me “Look, I’m just so damn happy that you are here with me right now. Can’t we just enjoy this moment?”

I needed a moment to gather my shit up then I smiled at her. She smiled back.

“By the way about Gen” I said moments later

“Oh…” she said as she remove her hand from mine and sank back to her seat dejectedly.

“She is not really my girlfriend”

“What?!”

“She’s my boss actually” I looked at her and saw that she was glaring at me, her breaths were shallow that I can clearly see the rising and falling of her chest.

“I don’t know why she said that she was my girlfriend” I continued  

We looked at each other’s eyes, no one dares to be the first one who’ll break, when suddenly she flashed the brightest smile that day.

“I’m glad” she uttered under her breath. But before I can push for more details Harold cut me off.

“We’re here!” he declared.

We both looked outside and saw my old building in front of us.

“Well, I guess this is good bye” I said as I flashed her a sad smile.

“Let me walk you to your door”

“Oh you don’t have to. You’ll be late for your flight!” I protested

“No no. I still got time ---“ she said, but Harold interjected.

“I’m afraid your friend here is correct Ms. Carol. We really need to get going---“

Carol glowered at Harold that the grown man trailed off mid-sentence. If only looks could kill.

“Come on now” Carol said as she opened her side of the door.

When we reached the door of my building I looked at her and saw that she was staring at me intently. Feeling the heat creep up from my face I told her “Good bye. Have a safe trip Carol”

I saw her opened her mouth, as if she was about to say something but thought against it and I don’t want that. I want her to freely say the things that are going on inside her mind while she’s with me - even if we’re down to our last minutes together.

“Whaaat?” I asked her pushing and wanting to know her thoughts.

“Well --- You haven’t showed me your work yet” she said very slowly as if she was thorough in selecting each word and careful in saying it out loud.

“Oh Carol, you’ll miss your flight!” I exclaimed even though that I do want her to spend a little more time with me before our inevitable separation.

“No, no. I won’t.” she said shaking her head profusely “We got a little more time.”

“Please?” Carol pleaded, I sighed because I know that I cannot resist those begging eyes.

“Okay. But you can only stay for 10 minutes or else Harold over there will break my door, alright?”

Carol laughed, it made my heart swell and ache a little. I opened the door to the building and she followed me inside. In the lobby of the building we were confronted by a big old winding stairway.

“I love these kind of old stairways” Carol smiled and asked “What floor are you in?”

“Third” I replied.

We started up the stairs, our arms so close into each other. We were not saying anything and acting that everything was normal. As we continue our ascent, I caught her stealing glances, I shyly smiled at her then she teasingly bumped my hip with hers. Eventually we reached my front door then I pulled out my keys and held the door open for her.

“Would you like something to drink? I think I may have some beer and rye---” I asked Carol as we both crossed the threshold.

“Oh no no. I’ve completely swear off alcohol in my life... for now” she said laughing and added “A cup of tea would be nice”

“Alright. Make yourself at home” I said before making my way towards the kitchen to boil water for the tea then I put away my chemicals under the kitchen sink. I saw Carol roam around my small apartment looking at the photos that were hanging on my wall.

“These are seriously good photos Therese” she said.

“Thanks, I guess” thankful that I’m in the kitchen that she can’t see my fully flustered face. Hearing her say that she thinks my work is good means everything to me. It gives me more meaning to strive and work hard more.

“You should really start working on your portfolio Darling” she added.

“I know, I know” I chuckled.

I have already put the kettle on the stove so I decided to retreat back to the living room while I am waiting for it to boil. She didn’t noticed that I was back so I made use of the time to look at her and take all of her in. I watched Carol as she continues to roam around the room; letting her hand trail the spines of my books placed on the shelf in one end of the room and picking up picture of a younger me on display.

“Do you print your own photos?” Carol asked.

“Yes, I do” I said, startling her that I have already made my way to the room undetected. I smiled apologetically.

“I’ve converted my spare bathroom as my dark room” I continued.

“Can you show me how?” she said once again flashing an irresistible smile.  

I thought about it for a moment for I was having second thoughts in granting her request. Not because she’s going to miss her plane but because of the fact that I don’t know if I can control myself in such close proximity with Carol again. But finally I decided and said

“We will just have to make it quick. Just a general overview okay?”

She exclaimed in delight.

“Well, lead the way Ms. Belivet” she then held out her hand for me to take. And of course, I took it and led her towards my dark room.

Having Carol inside my dark room made me realize how tiny it really is. As our vision adjust to the dark contrast and light of the room, my other senses heighten.

“Show me how you make your magic” she said as she casually placed her arm on my shoulder. Our bodies was pressed with each other that I can feel the rise and fall of her chest as she breathes. In such a close space Carol’s sexy perfume was dominating my senses – seriously I can’t even smell the chemicals! I tried to concentrate at the task at hand and gave her a quick presentation of printing a black and white negative. I was in the middle of explaining how to use the enlarger when I noticed that her attention was not with me.

“Carol, are you even listening?” I looked at her and saw that she was looking at the photos that I printed last time – these were mostly pictures of her and Rindy at the skating rink. She was so tall that the photos that were hanging on a string across the room for drying were just directly on her eye level – please note that I needed to tip toe and reach out for that damn string every time I want to hang one.

“I’m sorry, I should have asked” I said feeling embarrassed “I was thinking of sending those to you via Abby though. You can have it if you want”

She didn’t reply but instead she reached out her hand to get a certain picture but stopped midway and looked at me as if she’s asking for my permission. I smiled and nodded.

“That is my favorite too” it was a photo of her and Rindy laughing while holding hands in the skating rink.

“It is perfect” she whispered and looked at me “Thank you Therese” lowering her arm from my shoulders to my waist.

“Don’t mention it” I said, secretly thanking that she can’t see the blush on my face.

She tighten her grip on my waist and pulled me closer that our bodies were literally pressed to each other. I can feel my heart race – or was it hers? It doesn’t matter because she was slowly diminishing and closing the distance between our faces. Even with the dark expanse of our surrounding, I can still clearly see her grey eyes burn with so much desire. When our nose was about to touch, suddenly, we heard the cry of the kettle signalling that the water has reached its boiling point. We both gave out a breath that we didn’t notice that we were holding. As she pressed her forehead into mine, I closed my eyes, resisting the urge to latch on those sinful lips.

“I should probably get that” I whispered.

She nodded and slowly released me from her grip.

Once outside the dark room, I went straight to the kitchen to turn that kettle off while she marched towards the living room.

“Can I play some music?” she asked.

“Of course, my ipod is on the coffee table. It is already connected to the speakers.” I replied “Would you like some honey in your tea?”

“Sure” she replied. Seconds later a song was already playing, filling the whole apartment with music.

_You were the promise at dawn, I was the morning after._

_You were Jesus Christ my lord, I was the money launder._

I stepped outside the kitchen holding two cups of tea for the both of us. I found her casually lounging on the sofa with her eyes closed enjoying the song. I stared at her perfect face. Without me noticing it, my eyes wandered downward to her neck and then to her chest. I can feel my pulse was starting to race once again. Only a fool like Harge will let this woman go from their grasps.

               _You were the sensitive woman, I was the very reverend Freud._

_You were the manual of orgasm, I was the dirty little boy._

Only this woman can make me feel flustered just by doing nothing at all. I took a deep breath to relax my body. She must have sensed my presence for she opened her eyes and immediately smiled when she noticed me standing near her. I sat beside her and handed her the cup of tea. Without breaking our gaze, we both took a sip of out tea.

“Careful there. We don’t want you drenched in hot tea again, don’t we?” she teasingly said.

I rolled my eyes at her while trying to hide my smile and she laughed.

“I can’t believe Cohen’s dead” she suddenly said as she took another sip of her tea.

“It sucks” I said.

“Have you seen him perform live?”

“No, I haven’t got the chance.”

“Too bad” she said frowning “He was wonderful!”

               _You were the father of modern medicine, I was Mr. Clean._

_You were the whore and beast of Babylon, I was Rin Tin tin._

A beat then she suddenly put her cup down on the table and stood up. She motioned me to do the same, so I put my cup down too and stood in front of her.

“What are we doing?” I asked giggly.

She just shushed and pulled me closer. Carol kept our hands clasped together and never losing contact for a moment while leading me to the spacious part of the room. She held both of my hands the place it on top of her shoulders. She then pulled me closer with her hands resting on the curve of my hip. Then we fell into a natural and steady sway with the beat of the song. She then softly sang along with the song, almost whispering. I am becoming so sickeningly happy, and all I ever want to do is dance to this music with her forever.

               _You lusted after so many, I lay here with one._

_You defied your solitude, I came through alone._

_You said you could never love me, I undid your gown._

               _Is this what you wanted to live in a house that is haunted by the ghost of you and me._

“Carol, you are gonna miss that plane” I whispered. Without waiting for her answer I held her tighter, laid my head on her chest and closed my eyes.

“I know” she softly whispered before tightening her embrace and kissing the top of my head.

-END-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all - Congratulations! You have endured all my shenanigans for the past - i don't know - 2 or 3 months (I think?)  
> Second - Thank you so much! For enduring all my shenanigans for the past 2 or 3 months!
> 
> If you think that this story doesn't make any sense, well man or woman (whatever your gender is)up!  
> Life sucks and it sucked me hard. But I do suck harder! Lolololol.
> 
> All kidding aside, I thank you all for the comments and kudos! I really appreciate them. It was the fuel that kept me going!  
> And yes, the title doesn't have anything to do with the story. It was just a random slang term for "vagina". :D


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